Goofy-looking critter terrorizes paperboy

By Hum
in Real World News

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Grand Master

Hum

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Jaxon Gessel was riding his bike on his usual paper route in Smithfield, Utah, when he caught something out of the corner of his eye approaching him. Initially, he thought it was a dog--until it head-butted him off the bike, tackled him and eventually forced him up a tree. Turns out, the terrorizing creature was Voldemort--the goat, not the infamous Lord Voldemort from Harry Potter fame. Nevertheless, it was a scary encounter, and NBC News tells the story:

As the owner of the goat reveals, Voldemort is a nice and gentle goat that got loose from its chain. How gentle? Marissa Benson told the Deseret News that Voldemort is narcoleptic and will fall asleep when scared."

Nevertheless, in the early morning darkness, Voldemort chased down the 14-year-old Gessel, who was used to dealing with dogs but not attacking goats.

"It made a weird noise, kind of like a grunting noise," Gessel said. "I'm like, 'What the heck is that?'"

Then Gessel was head-butted off his bike. He tried getting away but the goat tackled him.

"It just freaked me out when it stood up on its hind legs and just wrapped its front legs around me and pulled me off," Gessel said.

To escape, Gessel climbed a tree. Whenever he thought it was safe to climb down, the goat would chase him back up to the tree, where he stayed for about an hour until two little girls walked by.

Not wanting the goat to harm the girls, who were freaking out, Gessel climbed down the tree and managed to chase the goat away.

In the meantime, Gessel's parents had called police because their son was 90 minutes late getting home.

Smithfield police officer Brandon Muir arrived on the scene. He told the Deseret News that the goat was over friendly and had jumped on him a few times, too.

The goat and Gessel both returned to their respective home no worse for wear, except for Gessel becoming a target for teasing from classmates.

"People are just like, 'Why are you scared of goats?' I'm like that was a freaky goat. I think it's like possessed or something."

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Grand Master

remixedcat

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Goat looks more like it wants to eat you.

^ It looks high on drugs to me. :D

Once you go skooma you can't go ooma!

Reminds me of when I was attacked by a rooster.

do tell....

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Lant

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bikes really freak alot of animals out or confuse them .... though deer appear not to be afraid of cyclists (well not where i meet deer anyway )

Completely agree with this, when ever I have to cycle by horses on bridle paths I always slow down and try my best not to spook them

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