Ranch Dressing Soda


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Lester's Fixins is known for making some unique -- and not always appreciated -- sodas. With flavors like buffalo chicken wing, peanut butter and jelly, and bacon, it's not hard to understand why. The latest in this crazy soda flavor line by Rocket Fizz was ranch dressing soda.

Of course, we had to try it. We were very pretty skeptical that we'd enjoy it -- at all. The skepticism did not arise from a lack of confidence in Rocket Fizz's ability to produce a quality soda. No, it was all about the fact that ranch dressing soda just does not seem like a good idea. Ever.

Curious as to how and why this soda came to be, we talked with Rocket Fizz co-founder Rob Powells. This is what he said: my Rocket Fizz business partner Ryan and I were eating lunch a few months ago and he went overboard with using ranch dressing with everything on his plate. I told him we ought to bottle a ranch dressing soda so he can have ranch dressing at his beck and call 24/7.

Yep, this soda came to be because of one man's obsession with ranch dressing.

Yesterday, the ranch dressing soda arrived. We did not tear open the box and pop the cap off the bottle. We waited a full 24 hours before we reluctantly gave it a taste.

Here's what our editors thought:

"The smell is like blue cheese and plastic and smelly feet. The taste is just like sugar and coconut, but THE SMELL IS SO REPULSIVE THAT I CANNOT GET PAST IT."

"The initial smell isn't great. But if you can get past that, the soda tastes like sweet candy. Not ranch dressing so much, but pleasant enough."

"Doesn't taste like ranch, and kind of has bad aftertaste."

"You know, there is almost nothing I won't eat, but the smell of this alone made my eyes water. The taste isn't the problem, it just tastes like sugar soda. The problem is the lactic, blue-cheesy, synthetic aroma that enters your soft palate and nose as you swallow. Just thinking about it is giving me the shivers.

I mean, why not mess with buttermilk powder and garlic extract before you turn to some weird synthetic chemical? This tastes like you soaked blue cheese in sunscreen in a plastic tub on a hot day, and then forced it through a seltzer siphon."

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I don't really understand who their target market is for these sorts of pop? Is there really enough people clamoring for these odd flavors?

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