Gerowen Posted November 8, 2013 Share Posted November 8, 2013 I feel your pain, but I have never taken medicine for it. There's a lot of little things that used to bother me, and I forced myself to get over some of them, but if I think about it, they still bother me. When walking, I had to make sure I took an even number of steps on each texture, starting with my left and ending with my right. For example, when stepping off a sidewalk onto the grass, I would sometimes alter my route to make sure I took steps of about the same distance and was able to make my first step onto the new texture with my left foot. Cracks in the sidewalk had to fall in the same position on each foot as well. If I opened a door, I had to turn around and go through the motion of turning the knob with my other hand to give it equal exposure. On computers, if people type too hard, or click to hard, it aggravates me to death. I've been able to get over most of it just by making a conscious effort to focus on other things and say, "It's not the end of the world", but if I notice something or think about it, they still bug me. I've stayed away from pills because I didn't want to take anything that would alter my state of mind. I figure if it bothers me, there's a reason, and I didn't want something that might make me think differently or make different decisions than I would normally. If people can't love me with all my quirks, they aren't worth keeping around. Edit: As a gun guy, another thing that kills me is the fact that right now I only have 19 rounds in the 20 round magazine in my AR-15. Shot a deer with it the other day and used one round. We'll see how long I can handle it having an uneven number of rounds in it, lol. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Evil Overlord Posted November 8, 2013 Share Posted November 8, 2013 Yes, but I don't take any meds for it fusi0n 1 Share Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fusi0n Posted November 8, 2013 Author Share Posted November 8, 2013 I feel your pain, but I have never taken medicine for it. There's a lot of little things that used to bother me, and I forced myself to get over some of them, but if I think about it, they still bother me. When walking, I had to make sure I took an even number of steps on each texture, starting with my left and ending with my right. For example, when stepping off a sidewalk onto the grass, I would sometimes alter my route to make sure I took steps of about the same distance and was able to make my first step onto the new texture with my left foot. Cracks in the sidewalk had to fall in the same position on each foot as well. If I opened a door, I had to turn around and go through the motion of turning the knob with my other hand to give it equal exposure. On computers, if people type too hard, or click to hard, it aggravates me to death. I've been able to get over most of it just by making a conscious effort to focus on other things and say, "It's not the end of the world", but if I notice something or think about it, they still bug me. I've stayed away from pills because I didn't want to take anything that would alter my state of mind. I figure if it bothers me, there's a reason, and I didn't want something that might make me think differently or make different decisions than I would normally. If people can't love me with all my quirks, they aren't worth keeping around. Edit: As a gun guy, another thing that kills me is the fact that right now I only have 19 rounds in the 20 round magazine in my AR-15. Shot a deer with it the other day and used one round. We'll see how long I can handle it having an uneven number of rounds in it, lol. Thanks for your reply. Sorry to hear about your OCD.. I feel the same away about taking meds.. I don't want them to alter my thought process.. but.. if I can't get a office back.. I might not have a choice.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LittleNeutrino Veteran Posted November 8, 2013 Veteran Share Posted November 8, 2013 Just found out yesterday they are adding ativan to my list of stuff. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fusi0n Posted November 8, 2013 Author Share Posted November 8, 2013 Just found out yesterday they are adding ativan to my list of stuff. To take daily? Ativan is pretty much fast acting xanax with a short life-span.. I don't really like to take them.. They turn me into a complete ******* too.. For that class of drug, I like to take klonopin, but I don't really any kind of benzo anymore unless I absolutely have too. I have RX for them, but unless I am having a really hard time at work with my OCD or panic attack.. I try to avoid them.. Also, "back in the day".. party fus10n would drink and take them.. not very smart and well.. just don't ever get that trend started.. My whole life went upside down during that period Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dane Posted November 8, 2013 Share Posted November 8, 2013 DONT take Cymbalta!! I have had OCD since I was around 11. I have been misdiagnosed with OCD, and tourette's syndrome when they first diagnosed my OCD. I have also been diagnosed with Major Depression Disorder, they thought at first it was bi-polar because my moods can change fast. They had two people decide it was MDD, for both OCD and depression TOTAL I have been on atleast if not more then 111 some worked, then wore off, others seemed to make the OCD worse, others didn't work at all. I also have general anxiety disorder. I think I also have a narcissistic personality disorder as well, or anti social personality disorder. I am now 26. The OCD has gotten better than what it was when I was younger. It sucked. My depression is also getting better. Doxepin worked wonders for my OCD but it also made me sleep ALOT. Recently I tried something new, Cymbalta. I was told "you will feel it in your system in days, instead of weeks". I couldn't sleep, I had sexual problems, nightmares, tiredness. I felt drunk at work, I was dizzy, tired, I felt like I was out of my body. Started reading the horror stories about people trying to quit the medicine...I quit instantly. Not worth it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Laurë Veteran Posted November 11, 2013 Veteran Share Posted November 11, 2013 Hi fusi0n.. Those symptoms with regard to noise intolerance are something I can relate to. I usually get like that when my anxiety is really bad, I'm tired, hungover, had too much caffeine, that sort of thing. It's like my senses are in over drive and I lose the ability to filter it all out. It really helped calmed down and just not care about these things.. but at the same time.. I didn't really care about anything while on it I was exactly like that on sertraline but it actually started causing me problems; I gained weight and spent too much money, for example. Overall I feel it helped me but it was something of a rollercoaster. It gave me a break from the panic and anxiety stuff, which had both mental and physical symptoms (can't breath, heart palpitations->"omg I'm going to die", yadda yadda .. If you get those, do get it checked out to make sure there isn't something physically wrong and to help ease your mind). My thoughts changed but in a good way. When worrying things came up, I could let them go without getting stuck ruminating on them or starting to get panicky. If I missed a dose though, I'd feel really REALLY bad, and coming off it was rough. As an SSRI I weaned off it slowly but it was tough. It all made me realise how much my mood and thoughts are related to chemistry in my brain as well as habit/routine of how I think about things. When I feel bad now it's actually easier to deal with because I realised how much it's just related to my perception and interpretation of things. Nowadays I'm aiming to stick with the advice of regular exercise, getting enough sleep, less drinking and trying to eat well. These things don't completely cure the problem but they make life MUCH easier to cope with. Oh and if you're like me, it might seem daunting to fix all that, I just picked one at a time to work on. Sleep is my number one priority and I try to walk a bit and eat well most days. The other issue is actively combating my thoughts when I realise it's anxiety and not entirely rational. That side is more difficult. CBT (cognitive behavioural therapy) might be helpful for some people https://moodgym.anu.edu.au/welcome fusi0n 1 Share Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fusi0n Posted November 11, 2013 Author Share Posted November 11, 2013 <sniped> Thank you for your reply. A few years ago, I was on buspar which is an SSRI.. that was a nightmare coming off.. Insomnia, heart palpitations, very blurry vision.. Those are rough.. It is nice to hear someone that was able to manage it on their own. I am hoping I can get there eventually.. Thanks for that link.. I have started the signup process.. Also, I guess my body goes through anxiety periods.. About for the past week and half.. I have been waking up with rapid heart rate and heart palpitations. It has been while since I have experienced any of these symptoms.. but I am and it is driving me crazy.. Sucks to go to bed wondering if you are going to wake up in a few hours thinking you are dieing. Maybe with exercise and cutting back drinking will help for the long run. I get a good be a sleep now but still feel very tired all the time :/ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LittleNeutrino Veteran Posted November 11, 2013 Veteran Share Posted November 11, 2013 To take daily? Ativan is pretty much fast acting xanax with a short life-span.. I don't really like to take them.. They turn me into a complete ******* too.. For that class of drug, I like to take klonopin, but I don't really any kind of benzo anymore unless I absolutely have too. I have RX for them, but unless I am having a really hard time at work with my OCD or panic attack.. I try to avoid them.. Also, "back in the day".. party fus10n would drink and take them.. not very smart and well.. just don't ever get that trend started.. My whole life went upside down during that period Yeah its to take one pill at night right before bed. fusi0n 1 Share Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fusi0n Posted November 11, 2013 Author Share Posted November 11, 2013 Yeah its to take one pill at night right before bed. Ah, gotcha.. I sometimes will take klonopin right before bed to help with waking up from panic attacks during sleeping.. I haven't had to in a while because they just went away on the own.. but they are back.. Thanks for your feedback. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fusi0n Posted November 11, 2013 Author Share Posted November 11, 2013 Went to the doctor today, my blood pressure was 160/100 and thinks that may be the cause for a lot of this lately.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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