The Sexodus, Part 1: The Men Giving Up On Women And Checking Out Of Society

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The Sexodus, Part 1: The Men Giving Up On Women And Checking Out Of Society

by Milo Yiannopoulos

4 Dec 2014, 3:34 AM PDT

"My generation of boys is f**ked," says Rupert, a young German video game enthusiast I've been getting to know over the past few months. "Marriage is dead. Divorce means you're screwed for life. Women have given up on monogamy, which makes them uninteresting to us for any serious relationship or raising a family. That's just the way it is. Even if we take the risk, chances are the kids won't be ours. In France, we even have to pay for the kids a wife has through adulterous affairs.

"In school, boys are screwed over time and again. Schools are engineered for women. In the US, they force-feed boys Ritalin like Skittles to shut them up. And while girls are favoured to fulfil quotas, men are slipping into distant second place.

"Nobody in my generation believes they're going to get a meaningful retirement. We have a third or a quarter of the wealth previous generations had, and everyone's fleeing to higher education to stave off unemployment and poverty because there are no jobs.

"All that wouldn't be so bad if we could at least dull the pain with girls. But we're treated like paedophiles and potential rapists just for showing interest. My generation are the beautiful ones," he sighs, referring to a 1960s experiment on mice that supposedly predicted a grim future for the human race.

After overpopulation ran out of control, the female mice in John Calhoun's "mouse universe" experiment stopped breeding, and the male mice withdrew from the company of others entirely, eating, sleeping, feeding and grooming themselves but doing little else. They had shiny coats, but empty lives.

"The parallels are astounding," says Rupert.

*

Never before in history have relations between the sexes been so fraught with anxiety, animosity and misunderstanding. To radical feminists, who have been the driving force behind many tectonic societal shifts in recent decades, that's a sign of success: they want to tear down the institutions and power structures that underpin society, never mind the fall-out. Nihilistic destruction is part of their road map.

But, for the rest of us, the sight of society breaking down, and ordinary men and women being driven into separate but equal misery, thanks to a small but highly organised group of agitators, is distressing. Particularly because, as increasing numbers of social observers are noticing, an entire generation of young people?mostly men?are being left behind in the wreckage of this social engineering project.

Social commentators, journalists, academics, scientists and young men themselves have all spotted the trend: among men of about 15 to 30 years old, ever-increasing numbers are checking out of society altogether, giving up on women, sex and relationships and retreating into pornography, sexual fetishes, chemical addictions, video games and, in some cases, boorish lad culture, all of which insulate them from a hostile, debilitating social environment created, some argue, by the modern feminist movement.

You can hardly blame them. Cruelly derided as man-children and crybabies for objecting to absurdly unfair conditions in college, bars, clubs and beyond, men are damned if they do and damned if they don't: ridiculed as basement-dwellers for avoiding aggressive, demanding women with unrealistic expectations, or called rapists and misogynists merely for expressing sexual interest.

Jack Rivlin is editor-in-chief of student tabloid media start-up The Tab, a runaway success whose current strap-line reads: "We'll stop writing it when you stop reading it." As the guiding intelligence behind over 30 student newspapers, Rivlin is perhaps the best-placed person in the country to observe this trend in action. And he agrees that the current generation of young men find it particularly difficult to engage with women.

"Teenage boys always have been useless with girls, but there's definitely a fear that now being well-intentioned isn't enough, and you can get into trouble just for being clumsy," he says. "For example, leaning in for a kiss might see you branded a creep, rather than just inept."

The new rules men are expected to live by are never clearly explained, says Rivlin, leaving boys clueless and neurotic about interacting with girls. "That might sound like a good thing because it encourages men to take the unromantic but practical approach of asking women how they should behave, but it causes a lot of them to just opt out of the game and retreat to the sanctuary of their groups of lads, where being rude to women gets you approval, and you can pretty much entirely avoid one-on-one socialising with the opposite sex."

"There are also a lot of blokes who ignore women because they are scared and don't know how to act. It goes without saying that boys who never spend any time alone with women are not very good at relationships."

Rivlin has noticed the increased dependence on substances, normally alcohol, that boys are using to calm their nerves. "I've heard a lot of male students boast about never having experienced sober sex," he says. "They're obviously scared, which is natural, but they would be a lot less scared and dysfunctional if they understood 'the rules.'"

The result? "A lot of nice but awkward young men are opting out of approaching women because there is no opportunity for them to make mistakes without suffering worse embarrassment than ever."

Most troublingly, this effect is felt more acutely among poorer and less well educated communities, where the package of support resources available to young men is slight. At my alma mater, the University of Cambridge, the phenomenon barely registers on the radar, according to Union society president Tim Squirrell.

"I don't think I've really noticed a change recently," he says. "This year has seen the introduction of mandatory consent workshops for freshers, which I believe is probably a good thing, and there's been a big effort by the Women's Campaign in particular to try and combat lad culture on campus.

The atmosphere here is the same as it was a year ago - mostly nerdy guys who are too afraid to approach anyone in the first place, and then a smaller percentage who are confident enough to make a move. Obviously women have agency too, and they approach men in about the same numbers as they do elsewhere. There certainly haven't been any stories in [campus newspaper] The Tab about a sex drought on campus."

"I think that people are probably having as much sex as ever," he adds. At Cambridge, of course, that may not mean much, and for a variety of socioeconomic and class-based reasons the tribes at Oxford and Cambridge are somewhat insulated from the male drop-out effect.

But even at such a prestigious university with a largely middle- and upper-class population, those patronising, mandatory "consent" classes are still being implemented. Squirrell, who admits to being a feminist with left-of-centre politics, thinks they're a good idea. But academics such as Camille Paglia have been warning for years that "rape drives" on campus put women at greater risk, if anything.

Women today are schooled in victimhood, taught to be aggressively vulnerable and convinced that the slightest of perceived infractions, approaches or clumsy misunderstandings represents "assault," "abuse" or "harassment." That may work in the safe confines of campus, where men can have their academic careers destroyed on the mere say-so of a female student.

But, according to Paglia, when that women goes out into the real world without the safety net of college rape committees, she is left totally unprepared for the sometimes violent reality of male sexuality. And the panics and fear-mongering are serving men even more poorly. All in all, education is becoming a miserable experience for boys.

*

In schools today across Britain and America, boys are relentlessly pathologised, as academics were warning as long ago as 2001. Boyishness and boisterousness have come to be seen as "problematic," with girls' behaviour a gold standard against which these defective boys are measured. When they are found wanting, the solution is often drugs.

One in seven American boys will be diagnosed with Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) at some point in their school career. Millions will be prescribed a powerful mood stabiliser, such as Ritalin, for the crime of being born male. The side effects of these drugs can be hideous and include sudden death.

Meanwhile, boys are falling behind girls academically, perhaps because relentless and well-funded focus has been placed on girls' achievement in the past few decades and little to none on the boys who are now achieving lower grades, fewer honors, fewer degrees and less marketable information economy skills. Boys' literacy, in particular, is in crisis throughout the West. We've been obsessing so much over girls, we haven't noticed that boys have slipped into serious academic trouble.

So what happened to those boys who, in 2001, were falling behind girls at school, were less likely to go to college, were being given drugs they did not need and whose self-esteem and confidence issues haven't just been ignored, but have been actively ridiculed by the feminist Establishment that has such a stranglehold on teaching unions and Left-leaning political parties?

In short: they grew up, dysfunctional, under-served by society, deeply miserable and, in many cases, entirely unable to relate to the opposite sex. It is the boys who were being betrayed by the education system and by culture at large in such vast numbers between 1990 and 2010 who represent the first generation of what I call the sexodus, a large-scale exit from mainstream society by males who have decided they simply can't face, or be bothered with, forming healthy relationships and participating fully in their local communities, national democracies and other real-world social structures.

A second sexodus generation is gestating today, potentially with even greater damage being done to them by the onset of absurd, unworkable, prudish and downright misandrist laws such as California's "Yes Means Yes" legislation?and by third-wave feminism, which dominates newspapers like the Guardian and new media companies like Vox and Gawker, but which is currently enjoying a hysterical last gasp before women themselves reject it by an even greater margin than the present 4 out of 5 women who say they want nothing to do with the dreaded f-word.

*

The sexodus didn't arrive out of nowhere, and the same pressures that have forced so many millennials out of society exert pressure on their parent's generation, too. One professional researcher in his late thirties, about whom I have been conversing on this topic for some months, puts it spicily: "For the past, at least, 25 years, I've been told to do more and more to keep a woman. But nobody's told me what they're doing to keep me.

"I can tell you as a heterosexual married male in management, who didn?t drop out of society, the message from the chicks is: 'It's not just preferable that you should ###### off, but imperative. You must pay for everything and make everything work; but you yourself and your preferences and needs can ###### off and die.'"

Women have been sending men mixed messages for the last few decades, leaving boys utterly confused about what they are supposed to represent to women, which perhaps explains the strong language some of them use when describing their situation. As the role of breadwinner has been taken away from them by women who earn more and do better in school, men are left to intuit what to do, trying to find a virtuous mean between what women say they want and what they actually pursue, which can be very different things.

Men say the gap between what women say and what they do has never been wider. Men are constantly told they should be delicate, sensitive fellow travellers on the feminist path. But the same women who say they want a nice, unthreatening boyfriend go home and swoon over simple-minded, giant-chested, testosterone-saturated hunks in Game of Thrones. Men know this, and, for some, this giant inconsistency makes the whole game look too much like hard work. Why bother trying to work out what a woman wants, when you can play sports, masturbate or just play video games from the comfort of your bedroom?

Jack Donovan, a writer based in Portland who has written several books on men and masculinity, each of which has become a cult hit, says the phenomenon is already endemic among the adult population. "I do see a lot of young men who would otherwise be dating and marrying giving up on women," he explains, "Or giving up on the idea of having a wife and family. This includes both the kind of men who would traditionally be a little awkward with women, and the kind of men who aren't awkward with women at all.

"They've done a cost-benefit analysis and realised it is a bad deal. They know that if they invest in a marriage and children, a woman can take all of that away from them on a whim. So they use apps like Tinder and OK Cupid to find women to have protected sex with and resign themselves to being 'players,' or when they get tired of that, 'boyfriends.'"

He goes on: "Almost all young men have attended mandatory sexual harassment and anti-rape seminars, and they know that they can be fired, expelled or arrested based more or less on the word of any woman. They know they are basically guilty until proven innocent in most situations."

Donovan lays much of the blame for the way men feel at the door of the modern feminist movement and what he sees as its disingenuousness. "The young men who are struggling the most are conflicted because they are operating under the assumption that feminists are arguing in good faith," he says, "When in fact they are engaged in a zero-sum struggle for sexual, social, political and economic status?and they're winning.

"The media now allows radical feminists to frame all debates, in part because sensationalism attracts more clicks than any sort of fair or balanced discourse. Women can basically say anything about men, no matter how denigrating, to a mix of cheers and jeers."

That has certainly been the experience of several loose coalitions of men in the media recently, whether scientists outraged by feminist denunciations of Dr Matt Taylor, or video gamers campaigning under the banner of press ethics who saw their movement smeared as a misogynistic hate group by mendacious, warring feminists and so-called "social justice warriors".

Donovan has views on why it has been so easy for feminists to triumph in media battles. "Because men instinctively want to protect women and play the hero, if a man writes even a tentative criticism of women or feminism, he's denounced by men and women alike as some kind of extremist scoundrel. The majority of "men's studies" and "men's rights" books and blogs that aren't explicitly pro-feminist are littered with apologies to women.

"Books like The Myth of Male Power and sites like A Voice for Men are favourite boogeymen of feminists, but only because they call out feminists' one-sided hypocrisy when it comes to pursing 'equality.'"

Unlike modern feminists, who are driving a wedge between the sexes, Men's Rights Activists "actually seem to want sexual equality," he says. But men's studies authors and male academics are constantly tip-toeing around and making sure they don't appear too radical. Their feminine counterparts have no such forbearance, of course, with what he calls "hipster feminists," such as the Guardian's Jessica Valenti parading around in t-shirts that read: "I BATHE IN MALE TEARS."

"I'm a critic of feminism," says Donovan. "But I would never walk around wearing a shirt that says, "I MAKE WOMEN CRY." I'd just look like a jerk and a bully."

It's the contention of academics, sociologists and writers like Jack Donovan that an atmosphere of relentless, jeering hostility to men from entitled middle-class media figures, plus a few confused male collaborators in the feminist project, has been at least partly responsible for a generation of boys who simply don't want to know.

In Part 2, we'll meet some of the men who have "checked out," given up on sex and relationships and sunk into solitary pursuits or alcohol-fuelled lad culture. And we'll discover that the real victims of modern feminism are, of course, women themselves, who have been left lonelier and less satisfied than they have ever been.

Some names have been changed.

 

Original Article

[blackjezuz]

TLDR; wah!!!!

[+Warwagon MVC]

Do we get a cliff note version?

[Praetor]

very interesting read. the fact that men don't actually know their spot in today's society is most telling and having woman not needing men the beginning of a much bigger problem.

[Krome]

Nice article... although this article sounds like it's from a misogynist, it seems to bring out the real point that society is facing.  I like the article.  Can't disagree much but then again, I might be the misogynist type.

[Xilo]

 

 

TLDR; wah!!!!

Do we get a cliff note version?

Women have a lot of power over men in the fact they can call harassment, rape, divorce, etc and ruin a guy's future. The guy is assumed guilty. Off remarks to your buds at work can cost you your job and career. That and dating nowadays is the polar opposite of when the previous generation was dating. Therefore, many younger men across the globe are sick of the ###### and giving up on women altogether.

 

This is actually becoming a serious issue for some countries. Japan, for instance, there's an increasing number of men checking out. Less people are getting married and less people are having kids.

[Praetor]

Nice article... although this article sounds like it's from a misogynist, it seems to bring out the real point that society is facing.  I like the article.  Can't disagree much but then again, I might be the misogynist type.

 

IMHO, men and women are very different but share many similar concepts; the fact that today's society is pushing men into a corner while heavy promoting women is almost as bad as pushing down women like it always happened; seems that gender is getting revenge (at least in some very few feminist heads). Family and children are getting most affected, with high divorce rates and low children counts.

 

Both genders should have their own spots in society (individual) and their own shared spots as well, but it's not like that.

[+Warwagon MVC]

Condoms are your friend. Unless you have sex Neowin Style! :laugh:

[Hum]

I'm ahead of my time -- I gave up on females long ago. ;)

[spaceelf]

I'm ahead of my time -- I gave up on females long ago. ;)

We don't need you to have kids any more than you all need me to, that's for sure

[sinetheo]

Do any of you know whats it like to be female? The crap, harassment, insulting notions you're an idiot, rape, child rearing, and vulnerabilities they go through is just the beginning.

Go ask one?

Imagine in probability if your chromosome was switched to an X during your conception? Your life would be nothing like it is now.

Your Husband left congrats to your new life of poverty!Go back to school and better yourself? Oops Daddy is gone and little Suzzie needs dinner and supervision. Hmm your ex is out getting his masters and chick's, partying,and a real life. YOU took off several years and are unhirable to HR for his kid. Mc job for you!

How about being the 70% who are raped mostly by someone they know? Can't trust any man now for a RT and screwed up nightmares for years.

You don't have genetic makup to look pretty. No one takes your pc skills seriously because your fat. WTF.

Still can look good but because the extra X gave you boobs you lost that promotion to a man?! Men smooth talk and friend others and sexism still there.

Vulnerability is part of you now. You don't like going into a city by yourself and get angry and intimidated easier without that male mindset of dominance in your relationships and doing things. What we blow off is a big deal and minds are just different and defensive.

Tell us men why we are the victims? I am male but we got it easy. Yes we need to help out with kids and woman put up with so much more.

[spaceelf]

Tell us men why we are the victims? I am male but we got it easy. Yes we need to help out with kids and woman put up with so much more.

I don't agree with the article but I understand it.  So much of life you're told 'people never change' and you get to feeling like if you made one mistake you're just going to keep making it, so you give up.

 

There are plenty of things wrong with overly aggressive people, but the rest of us get tired of being told how we're the cause of everything wrong in the universe when we had nothing to do with it.

[sinetheo]

I don't agree with the article but I understand it.  So much of life you're told 'people never change' and you get to feeling like if you made one mistake you're just going to keep making it, so you give up.

 

There are plenty of things wrong with overly aggressive people, but the rest of us get tired of being told how we're the cause of everything wrong in the universe when we had nothing to do with it.

I don't know of anyone who thinks that? The author seems frustrated and angry he can't get any and girls laugh at him so he writes a rant is the gist I get.

They do have a right to be resentful when they are stuck with a kid or kids and earning potential is throwe out all for a failed relationship where the man doesn't pay and has that job you gave up to pay for a lawyer to screw you over. Also I will mention office work in 2014 is no longer 9-5. Schools have early release now 1 day a week. WTF

Say goodbye good job and hello part time work with 1/3 pay to supervise kids. Oops can't? Husband takes kid and now you pay him???

See how this is a problem women get rightfully angry about?

[Decebalvs Rex]

I blame human evolution. There are some unwritten rules stored in our genes, I may be insane but what happens today is not far away from the female spider reaction - eating the male alive to survive and feed the new generation. Women have been surpressed for many years , maybe for thousands of years and today their time has come, maybe.

I still remember my grandfather saying that in the WW2, russian women or other women soldiers were four times more agressive and cruel than a man.

Somebody, someone, somewhere gives power to women, power by law, power in society, economical power and the traits described by the OP.

Am I wrong?

[spaceelf]

See how this is a problem women get rightfully angry about?

I have yet to see anything you said I disagree with.  I am not claiming to be a victim, just that the general message one hears over his life is 'go away.'  So many of us do.

[Osiris]

Not what I was expecting from the article - some colourful points but I don't tend to agree.  I think things like these articles focus on the extremes and even if that point is moot they are too localised and socioeconomic dependant to form cohesive patterns of male/female relationships across the globe.

[simplezz]

Nice article... although this article sounds like it's from a misogynist

Being critical of the actions of a woman or group of women isn't misogyny. That has to be the most misused word in the english dictionary. That's like saying someone who criticises a male is automatically a misandrist. And how often do you hear that term being thrown around? Never!

 

I might be the misogynist type.

Having an opinion and being male doesn't warrant an apology. That's part of the problem.

As to the article, it hits the nail on the head. I'm neither a feminist nor a masculinist, I'm a humanist. We should all be treated equally, irrespective of our genders. That's why it's so infuriating when SJW's and extreme feminists start bullying communities just because they don't obsequiously conform to the 'narrative' that males are inherently misogynistic rapists, who should feel perpetual guilt for some illusionary crime to womankind. Now that's what I call gender inequality. 

 

Not that all women are like that, but most are suffering because of a minority's agenda. As a consequence, I can understand why some men might prefer to disengage completely with a society that reviles them at every turn. With the advent of the internet and its inexhaustible supply of eclectic pornographic material, it's never been more easy to entirely refrain from seeking the company of the opposite sex other than for procreative purposes.

[smooth_criminal1990]

Not what I was expecting from the article - some colourful points but I don't tend to agree.  I think things like these articles focus on the extremes and even if that point is moot they are too localised and socioeconomic dependant to form cohesive patterns of male/female relationships across the globe.

Well said! Being over-focused on one side/problem always seems to be a common theme in many such articles about discrimination.

[HawkMan]

Do any of you know whats it like to be female? The crap, harassment, insulting notions you're an idiot, rape, child rearing, and vulnerabilities they go through is just the beginning.

 

 

so... it's like being a male....

[sinetheo]

I blame human evolution. There are some unwritten rules stored in our genes, I may be insane but what happens today is not far away from the female spider reaction - eating the male alive to survive and feed the new generation. Women have been surpressed for many years , maybe for thousands of years and today their time has come, maybe.

I still remember my grandfather saying that in the WW2, russian women or other women soldiers were four times more agressive and cruel than a man.

Somebody, someone, somewhere gives power to women, power by law, power in society, economical power and the traits described by the OP.

Am I wrong?

 

Reason women soldiers are cruel and more aggressive is by nature they are nurturers and protectors of their kids and husbands. Touch a kid and you will get hurt regardless of the size of the girl

 

Men respect others in combat and have feelings of regret and well he is here stuck too etc. Women it is ".. he is a threat to my family KILL HIM!"

 

When the man is out hunting and she is alone and vulnerable with the babies you bet that instinct helps someone who wants to rape or steal right biologically

[siah1214]

Blah blah blah whine whine whine nothing is my fault it's the fault of the evil womenz don't make me take responsibility for my social ineptitude. 

 

 

Give me a break. 

[+Anarkii Subscriber²]

As a 38 year old male with no kids and no intention of having kids, all I can say is: good luck with this planet. Thankfully ill be long dead when it turns to crap. 

[TPreston]

"Women have given up on monogamy, "

Why so vague? Because this is just a proxy for bashing woman in employment other than "baby making".

[The Evil Overlord]

so... it's like being a male....

+1

 

I'm noticing this to be growing over the last few years, (at the college where I used to work as security 15 years ago, and even now as working as a truck driver) 

[Setnom]

I basically gave up on women and although I don't agree with the article in general, I can understand that it might be frustrating.

 

I wouldn't give up on women if women weren't so skillfully pushing me to the side and picking WORSE men than me. 100% of the times I tried (and I'm not kidding), they said: "Oh, I like you as a friend" or "You're like my brother!".

 

This is after I've been a total gentleman, always behaving like women expect a man to behave. Unlike those other men, who even after cheating on the women, those women accepted them back. They chose a CHEATER, twice, over me, who could have been nothing but faithful. Sigh.

 

Sorry by getting a bit off-topic.