joke Why did the chicken cross the road?

[Ice_Blue]

Kindergarten Teacher:

To get to the other side.

Aristotle:

It is the nature of chickens to cross roads.

Saddam Hussein:
This was an unprovoked act of rebellion and we were quite justified in dropping 50 tons of nerve gas on it.

Hippocrates:
Because of an excess of phlegm in its pancreas.

Martin Luther King, Jr.:
I envision a world where all chickens will be free to cross roads without having their motives called into question.

Moses:
And God came down from the Heavens, and He said unto the chicken, "Thou shalt cross the road." And the chicken crossed the road, and there was much rejoicing.

Richard M. Nixon:
I just want to make one thing perfectly clear. The chicken did not cross the road. I repeat, the chicken did NOT cross the road.

Machiavelli:
The point is that the chicken crossed the road. Who cares why? The end of crossing the road justifies whatever motive there was.

Freud:
The fact that you are at all concerned that the chicken crossed the road reveals your underlying sexual insecurity.

Bill Gates:
I have just released the new Chicken Office 2007, which will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your checkbook.

Oliver Stone:
The question is not, "Why did the chicken cross the road?" Rather, it is, "Who was crossing the road at the same time, whom we overlooked in our haste to observe the chicken crossing?"

Darwin:
Chickens, over great periods of time, have been naturally selected in such a way that they are now genetically disposed to cross roads.

Einstein:
Whether the chicken crossed the road or the road moved beneath the chicken depends on your frame of reference.

Buddha:
Asking this question denies your own chicken nature.

Ralph Waldo Emerson:
The chicken did not cross the road . . . it transcended it.

Ernest Hemingway:
To die. In the rain.

Nietzschie:

The chicken does not exist.

Colonel Sanders:
I missed one?
 

[Dick Montage]

This was in an email from well over 5 years ago.  Wow, blast from the past!

[123456789A]

Steve Ballmer:

Crossing the road? A chicken? That's the dumbest chicken in the world, and it doesn't appeal to business customers because it doesn't have a keyboard!

[blerk]

Vic Gundotra: To get to the other chicken. But two chickens do not make an eagle. 

[astropheed Veteran]

"Freud" had me laughing out loud.

[Kazama Levi]

Heisenberg:

The chicken is both dead and not dead at the same time. As such, it exists simultaneously on both sides of the road, because as a dead chicken, it can't cross roads, while as a live chicken, it can and has already done so.

[Draconian Guppy]

A warwagon responde needs to be on there.

[Torolol]

This was in an email from well over 5 years ago.  Wow, blast from the past!

yep, theres more from Al Lowe site.

http://www.allowe.com/laughs/book/Why Did The Chicken Cross The Road.htm

[DConnell Member]

I'll add the one I came up with the last time this thread came up:

 

Barack Obama: I have no knowledge of any alleged road-crossing activities by any chickens in my administration.

[+Warwagon MVC]

A warwagon responde needs to be on there.

Dot Matrix:

So he can use Windows 8

[wahoospa]

Because the fox on the other side of the road called him a 'chicken'.

[The Evil Overlord]

Because the fox on the other side of the road called him a 'chicken'.

What did The Fox say??

[Kazama Levi]

Dot Matrix:

So he can use Windows 8

 

PGHammer:

The chicken just wanted to escape the bad economic situation - which is also the reason why it didn't buy Windows 8.

[+Warwagon MVC]

PGHammer:

The chicken just wanted to escape the bad economic situation - which is also the reason why it didn't buy Windows 8.

 

DocM

To get as far away from Obama as possible.

 

Damien R.

Casting for the chicken announced.

[NightmarE D]

Neowin User:

In hopes that he/she would be hit by oncoming traffic and never have to see another Warwagon joke

 

"Warwagoned" you could say

[Ian S.]

PGHammer:

The chicken just wanted to escape the bad economic situation - which is also the reason why it didn't buy Windows 8.

Kazama Levi:

Because on this side of the road, there exists Windows 8 live tiles, for which the chicken has no intentions of being around.

Kirk:

To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.

[Guest]

#ChickenGate

To fight for ethics in chickenism.

 

#AntiChickenGate

To fight online chicken harassment.

[The Evil Overlord]

To escape from his siblings, Sam and Ella

[Kazama Levi]

Steve Ballmer:

To play reversi, for just $99!

 

That's from this clip:

Ballmer sells Windows 1.0