What kind of activity can I get involved in that's gender balanced?


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I've tried speed dating a couple of time and it was all older women (i.e. Over 40).

 

Well I'm 29. So I would prefer not to date a women in their late 30s and up.

Just curious, why do you prefer not to date older women? Is it because you feel their looks decline after a certain age?

Because truth be told if I was in your situation not only would I date older women, they would be my focus.

There should in theory be a lot less games involved with them. You are still going to get games regardless, but since they have been around a little bit longer their tolerance for games should be lower, at least one would imagine that would be the case.

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The best place to find and meet girls/ women of any age is: COLLEGE. Find out at your nearest college about some class that will help you acquire some new skill and on the same time, it will also give you opportunities to meet with women.

I have seen/ met/ got laid with different kinds of women at college; Young, Older, Geeky, Nerdy, Asian, Spanish..... You name it. 

 

The problem with this is I think the girls will be way too young. I don't know when you folks go to college, but aren't you usually 18-19 when you get in? So in that sense, he would be about 10 years older than them.

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Gym, dancing, rambling (walks), charity events, heck most social gatherings,

All good and trusted methods to meet people, the trick is to not appear needy or look like someone desperate to meet someone, before you know it, someone will take a few minutes to open up a chat with you, and before you know it....

Remember, no one likes a creep or pervert, if at first glance you appear as a sociable and fun person, then you'll have better luck in getting a conversation with the right person for you.

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Just curious, why do you prefer not to date older women? Is it because you feel their looks decline after a certain age?

Because truth be told if I was in your situation not only would I date older women, they would be my focus.

There should in theory be a lot less games involved with them. You are still going to get games regardless, but since they have been around a little bit longer their tolerance for games should be lower, at least one would imagine that would be the case.

Generally, men date younger females. It's very rare where I see a couple where the woman is younger and if so, she's usually only 1-2 years older... Not significantly older.

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You have to understand most single women around your age don't go out by themselves to groups like that.  And the ones that do are probably not what you want IMO.  There aren't really many gender balanced activities.  It's either a heavy male or female lean.  Most the time females in any heavy male group are there because of a male that's there as well.  A lot of relationships come from work, church and friends.  Not pushing any agenda here, just facts.  If those aren't really working for you, personally I'd recommend to get out and go to bars so you can get used to talking to women.  Then when you do see a girl at a bookshop or something you have the courage to talk to her.  That's where it will really come from.  Putting yourself out there, but only when you can tell body language and when someone is interested.  There are always signals.  And you also need to learn how to detect the crazies.  That's a very useful skill.  Be wary of women that are too easy to fall into.  There are entire libraries on this, but honestly it comes down to getting used to talking to women.  How else will you know what you like and don't like?

 

I go to church and it's mostly old people there. I'm only one out of a handful of young people that go and the ones that do go just go for the worship, not to meet people. And that's fine. I go to church for the same reason. That's why I'm trying to get involved in social activities. THAT is where I'm hoping to meet people.

 

It's so weird. I live in NYC and I can simply take a walk through the city any time during the day and I can see A LOT of attractive, young girls who'd I'd be happy to get to know, be friends with, or even possibly date. Yet, I join activities and the group of people that join are completely different people. They're not the same attractive, young girls you typically see walking by you outside in your day to day life.

 

As for approaching people, I've gotten myself to try that last summer and it wasn't all that successful. The problem is, approaching random strangers (even if it's just a simple "hello") creeps people out because it's simply not the culture here in NYC. People go about their own thing and don't socialize with strangers. I'm not saying that 100% of NYers are like this, but most are and you will really have to get your feet wet and dirty before you finally encounter a friendly response from someone.

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also, if you still have not moved out of your moms house, it might be a good idea to do so.

 

I did finally purchase my own apartment. If all goes well with the loan and the BOD approval, then I should be expected to be moved into my new place by late June/early July. I hope having my own place will change things in my life because I'm just out of ideas already.

 

And yes, I did try dancing. I actually ended up making female enemies because a lot of them complained about the way I was leading. I mean, we're both taking beginner classes and I ended up getting scolded by another beginner student for not being the superior leader. I finally got fed up and stopped it because I was on the verge of losing my sanity.

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I go to church and it's mostly old people there. I'm only one out of a handful of young people that go and the ones that do go just go for the worship, not to meet people. And that's fine. I go to church for the same reason. That's why I'm trying to get involved in social activities. THAT is where I'm hoping to meet people.

 

It's so weird. I live in NYC and I can simply take a walk through the city any time during the day and I can see A LOT of attractive, young girls who'd I'd be happy to get to know, be friends with, or even possibly date. Yet, I join activities and the group of people that join are completely different people. They're not the same attractive, young girls you typically see walking by you outside in your day to day life.

 

As for approaching people, I've gotten myself to try that last summer and it wasn't all that successful. The problem is, approaching random strangers (even if it's just a simple "hello") creeps people out because it's simply not the culture here in NYC. People go about their own thing and don't socialize with strangers. I'm not saying that 100% of NYers are like this, but most are and you will really have to get your feet wet and dirty before you finally encounter a friendly response from someone.

 

I can see that.  My sister lived in NYC and I visted a few times.  It's definitely a place that puts people on edge.  But I think with the right attitude and demeanor you can approach most people.  I can tell you this.  There are tons of girls that are wanting a good man.  They are also scared and not sure where to look.  That's why you have to be bold, not an ahole though.  There is a huge difference.  Girls love confidence.  It could be you need to move south and find a southern girl who isn't so jaded.  I will tell you this.  You will probably need to look for someone younger.  Most girls your age are either, divorced, bitter, has kids or is more focused on their career if they aren't married yet.  Not saying you wont find a good one in that age but its less likely unless you are willing to take on some challenges.

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I did finally purchase my own apartment. If all goes well with the loan and the BOD approval, then I should be expected to be moved into my new place by late June/early July. I hope having my own place will change things in my life because I'm just out of ideas already.

 

And yes, I did try dancing. I actually ended up making female enemies because a lot of them complained about the way I was leading. I mean, we're both taking beginner classes and I ended up getting scolded by another beginner student for not being the superior leader. I finally got fed up and stopped it because I was on the verge of losing my sanity.

DaDude, check your PM.

 

for people living in NYC there are lots of social gathering options. 

 

http://www.timeout.com/newyork/sport-fitness/social-sports-leagues-alternative-sports

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The problem with this is I think the girls will be way too young. I don't know when you folks go to college, but aren't you usually 18-19 when you get in? So in that sense, he would be about 10 years older than them.

 

There are no age restrictions/ limitations/ strict rules in College. If you ever been to some Community College, you would know that there are Women of all ages/ size/ color/ race. In Short, there's plenty of fish. From 18's, 20's to 40's even 50's. 

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OkCupid.. You can meet friends and dates.. Pretty solid site IMO..

 

I just joined about 20 minutes ago and some young girl with a hot picture just messaged me and said she wants to chat. She gave me her cell phone #. This sounds way too good to be true. Are you sure those profiles aren't some sort of scam or something?

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How naive are you? How can you be 29 and not have any grasp on the world?

 

Naive about what? OKCupid? I've never used these dating sites before, so obviously, I don't know much about it.

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I just joined about 20 minutes ago and some young girl with a hot picture just messaged me and said she wants to chat. She gave me her cell phone #. This sounds way too good to be true. Are you sure those profiles aren't some sort of scam or something?

Some of those are scams.. But, it's a very legit site.. 

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Some of those are scams.. But, it's a very legit site.. 

 

What tips me off is that most of those pictures look way too professional looking and don't look very casual. I'm a little skeptical but I'll still continue to give it a shot because I'm becoming a bit desperate right now.

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On the bright side, you might not find a girl but you may find something new that you didn't know you liked.

 

Dat turn of events.  :shiftyninja:

 

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What tips me off is that most of those pictures look way too professional looking and don't look very casual.

 

I've never used OKCupid, however on sites like that it's usually pretty easy to tell if a profile is fake or not by just looking at the pictures in my opinion.

 

Generally i'd say photos that look "too professional" or airbrushed are usually fake profiles, sure you might find some people have done a professional photo shoot day, I have female friends who have paid to do something like that. However generally you'd expect to see "less professional photos" e.g. out with their friends, selfies and so on... like you'd see on Facebook.

 

I don't think you'll have any problems spotting the difference to be honest.

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I didn't read all this properly so I apologise if it's been posted already but have a look on www.meetup.com - There's loads of interesting activities on there all over the place :)

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Porn production. Plenty of girls, plenty of sex, plenty of nice caring people that will "take care" of you if they found you are shy and / or virgin.

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I didn't read all this properly so I apologise if it's been posted already but have a look on www.meetup.com - There's loads of interesting activities on there all over the place :)

 

Yeah, that's where I'm trying out different groups and not getting much luck. A lot of the groups there are basically mostly men or older women. No gender balance whatsoever. And all the groups I joined have a very high turnover, so you see people once and that's the last you'll ever see them. Since I'm not a very outgoing person, it's very difficult for me to develop relationships with people on one day. I need to see the same people for a while. And I think the same can be said with dancing too when I tried it. VERY high turnover there. In fact, there's a higher turnover with female students than males. I think this is due to the fact that so many women take a dance class because they want to learn to shake their booty and look sexy, but then discover how hard it really is and then give up.

 

Maybe there's something I missing on meetup. I've been searching to the ends of the earth on that site trying to find the right group for me in the NYC area and I'm not finding a good, gender-balanced group for people in their 20s and 30s. If you find something, feel free to post the link and I'll look into it.

 

 

Porn production. Plenty of girls, plenty of sex, plenty of nice caring people that will "take care" of you if they found you are shy and / or virgin.

 

LOL, I'm not big enough. Size does matter in the porn industry and I'm not blessed with that gift, unfortunately.

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