Keldyn Posted February 17, 2002 Share Posted February 17, 2002 Post your predictions people. This could be quite amusing. :) - This humorous take was derived from an article posted in Maximum PC Dec. End 2002 - Research reveals that the internet is used almost exclusively for downloading p0rn. In reaction - top brower manufacturer Microsoft changes its slogan to "You want to go where today" !?!? 2005 - After a crushing defeat in the second and third and fourth antitrust trials Microsoft is split into a hundread different pieces. These are then hidden in secret locations around the world. Bill Gates promises to find them and one day reunite Microsoft. "Then yall be sorry! " Gates tells reporters, before heading into the sunset cracking a bullwhip. 2006 - Apple releases the iPhone. A simple device that makes it easy to talk to nearly anybody in the world. You plug the device into a telephone socket and dial the persons special identifying code ( known as a "phone number" ). However usage of the device is made tricky because the standard numeric keypad has been replaced by one big aqua-blue button. Available in tangerine, cherry, cobalt and blue translucent colors. Sales of the iPhone sky rocket. 2007 - Intel releases the first 100 Ghz processor. The chip allows faster Internet Acess and better multimedia. It also bakes potatoes, and gives you a nice all over tan. Notebooks fitted with the chip hover an inch above the ground while emitting an eerie humming sound. meanwhile IBM sends out a press release headed, " Hey ! We're still around, you know ! " But sadly... nobody cares. 2010 - It's revealed that Steve Jobs doesnt really exist and is infact a clever marketing concept by Apple. The real person running the company is actually a man called the "wizard" and lives in a trailer in remote Arizona. Suddenly the rainbow colors in the apple logo make sense. Greetz Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FthrJACK Posted February 17, 2002 Share Posted February 17, 2002 i believe the steve jobs bit... :ditsy: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
configure Veteran Posted February 17, 2002 Veteran Share Posted February 17, 2002 ROFL!!!! :D :D :D :D :D Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Keldyn Posted February 18, 2002 Author Share Posted February 18, 2002 Figured i would add a few more. ;) 2012 - Windows XP 2 is finally released. Following the anti - trust case , several other companies are allowed to release clone OSes and the market is flooded with poor imitations. One company operating out of a LA p0rn shop releases "Sindows XP". It becomes an instant best seller despite not being available in tangerine, cherry or cobalt blue colors. 2015 - In what critics see as an increasingly desparate move by the ageing and impotent IBM, the company invades Luxembourg. Monaco increases its border security. An IBM representative says, "We invented the PC you know ! " But once again, and sadly... nobody is listening. The company applies to become the 52nd State of The US. Their application is turned down and hawaii increases border security. 2016 - Bill gates returns from his quest to reunite Microsoft, unsuccessful and penniless. He sells the film rights of his adventures to Steven Spielberg and is rich again. He celebrates by building his house out of $1000 bills and becomes the first person to have a hole in the wall cash machine in his bathroom. 2018 - Apple releases the iSpecs. These virtual reality glasses are made out of clea perspex and let users experience the world and everything in it in glorious 3D. Available in tangerine, cherry or cobalt blue colors, the glasses are advertised in a TV advert in which the Rolling Stones sing " i can see clearly now". They're an instant hit and are followed by iWear, a range of invisible clothing popular with world leaders, such as emperors. 2020 - It's announced that everybody in the world has an email address. At the same time IBM digs out an old document which shows it trademarked the @ symbol in 1952. This means everybody owes IBM huge royalties. In order to repay their debts, the 9.6 billion people of the world are turned into technical support staff for IBM mainframe computers. 2024 - following Intels refusal to pay royalties to IBM, the multinational attacks Intel's headquaters. One bomb hits the chip research lab where Intel engineers are testing the highly unstable 10,000 Ghz processor. A nuclear chain reaction is started and the world is virtually destroyed leaving isolated tribes of people who return to the Stone Age ways. Luckily Bill Gates survives and tells waiting primitive reporters that one day every person in every home will have fire making equipment. Everybody scoffs but gates is seen heading into the forest to gather tinder sticks.... Greetz Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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