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18 Totally New Yo Momma Jokes: January 2012

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americab    5

1. Your Momma is so fat, she takes her picture with Google Earth.

2. Your Momma is so fat, mountain lions sleep on her titties

3. Your Momma smells. She smells so much they use her to wake people out of comas.

4. Your mother is enormous. As a safety precaution they pay her to live next to the Hoover Dam.

5. Yo Momma is so fat, her pacemaker comes with a solar panel.

6. Your Mother is so fat, her water heater needs a nuclear reactor.

7. Your mothers pant size is xxx. When she walks down the street people try to walk into her ass to watch movies.

8. You ever hear of No Child Left Behind? Your mother is so dumb they had to give up on her.

9. Your mother is so old, they use strands of her hair to carbon date dinosaur fossils.

10. Your mother is titanic. Anytime she goes into water she sinks.

11. Your mother is so fat, she sells her toenails as body armor.

12. Your mother is so fat, I have to use sonar to talk to her.

13. Your mother is so fat even blind people can see her

14. Your mother is filthy. She goes to the sperm bank to clean out her mouth.

15. Scientists watch your mother very closely. They have no choice! Your mother is so fat she can be seen from anywhere on earth.

16. I've never seen a pig like your mother. Or any other type of animal for that matter.

17. Your mother is ugly. She once wore a Target shirt and people started shooting at her.

18. Your mothers face is like a bag of Skittles. Sweet,colorful and causes diabetes.

I decided to make some entirely new jokes. If you find them funny feedback would be awesome. That way I can know if I should try to write some more.

Edited by John S.
link snipped, jokes added--Neowin isn't the place to spam other sites
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+warwagon    9,938

The best one in that list was "Yo Momma is so fat, her pacemaker comes with a solar panel."

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americab    5

Glad you found it funny. I'm thinking about writing a bunch of them.

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+warwagon    9,938

Glad you found it funny. I'm thinking about writing a bunch of them.

Oh you wrote them? In that case... meh! 95% weren't funny. You successfully pulled a warwagon. Good Job!

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americab    5

What does the phrase "pulling a warwagon" mean? What's funny is that you decided to make your response harsh after I told you I wrote them. lol.

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ToeNipples    1

The two funny ones were:

Yo Momma is so fat, she takes her picture with Google Earth.

and

Yo Momma is so filthy she goes to the sperm bank to clean out her mouth.

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+warwagon    9,938

What does the phrase "pulling a warwagon" mean? What's funny is that you decided to make your response harsh after I told you I wrote them. lol.

you'll find out what pulling a Warwagon means soon enough on this forum! :laugh:

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americab    5

Your mother and bubble wrap have a lot in common. Everyone likes to pop them.

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BeerFan    280

you'll find out what pulling a Warwagon means soon enough on this forum! :laugh:

facepalm-1.gif

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Nick H.    7,988

Yo mama so slow, she thought "yo mama" jokes were still funny.

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FMH    715

:o Woah! I'm really impressed that you made them yourself. That's some really high-quality work there.

And my favourite was the Google Earth one. :laugh:

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Muhammad Farrukh    1,079

Some are funny, to some extent

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InsaneNutter    959

Also my fav two! keep up the good work i enjoyed a fair few of them :)

The two funny ones were:

Yo Momma is so fat, she takes her picture with Google Earth.

and

Yo Momma is so filthy she goes to the sperm bank to clean out her mouth.

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XerXis    251

meh, not my kind of humor I guess

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Andrew Lyle    335

Maybe next well get a new list of chuck Norris facts.

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+fusi0n    1,568

I love yo momma jokes. however, these where very stupid.

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shakey    1,126

Best yo momma joke was done on America Dad -

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americab    5

I love yo momma jokes. however, these where very stupid.

It's were stupid, stupid.

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shakey    1,126

It's were stupid, stupid.

Well that's not very nice lol

Ooo, but it made me think of a anti yo momma joke...

Yo momma so dumb, she didn't teach you any manners. Not aimed at you, just a typical anti joke that was thought up because of your comment lol.

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Hum    6,930

Your momma is so fat, Earth now has two moons.

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shakey    1,126

yo momma so fat, she should diet.

Yo momma so dumb, the teachers failed her.

Yo momma so ugly, doctors recommened plastic surgery.

I find anti jokes more fun during these... as they are already pretty stupid to begin with :p

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Nefarious Trigger    6,987

The Google Earth one you most certainly did NOT write. Heard it years ago.

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americab    5

Well that's not very nice lol

Ooo, but it made me think of a anti yo momma joke...

Yo momma so dumb, she didn't teach you any manners. Not aimed at you, just a typical anti joke that was thought up because of your comment lol.

His mother is like a fire truck. She's usually got five guys on her.

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shakey    1,126

Yo momma looks like a dog, because of that little tale growing out of her spine.

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Chester0    15

3. Your mother is so fat even blind people can see her xD

win

Jokes are ok, the formatting i hate, too dark for this theme

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