American History 101


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It was the first day of school and a new student, Suzuki, son of a Japanese businessman, entered the fourth grade class. The teacher said, "Let's begin by reviewing some American history.

"Who said, ?Give me Liberty or give me Death' ?" She saw a sea of blank faces, except for Suzuki's

"Patrick Henry 1775," he said.

"Very good! Who said '...government of the people, by the people, for the people, shall not perish from the earth'?"

Again, no response, except from Suzuki. "Abraham Lincoln, 1863."

The teacher snapped, "Class, you should be ashamed. Suzuki, who is new to our country, knows more about its history than you do."

She heard a loud whisper, "Scr*w the Japs."

"Who said that?" she demanded.

Suzuki raised his hand: "Lee Iacocca, 1982."

At that point a student said, "I?m gonna puke." The teacher glared and asked, "All right! Who said that?"

Suzuki says, "George Bush, to the Japanese Prime Minister, 1991."

Furious, another student yells, "Oh yeah? S*ck this!"

Suzuki jumps up waving his hand and shouts, "Bill Clinton, to Monica Lewinsky, 1997!"

With near mob hysteria, someone screams, "You little sh*t. If you say anything else, I'll kill you."

Suzuki yells, "Gary Condit to Chandra Levy, 2001."

At this, the teacher fainted. The class gathered around her.

One of the kids says, "Oh sh*t, we're in BIG trouble!"

Suzuki says, ?Arthur Andersen, 2002."

Edited by John S.
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if only i knew who Arthur Andersen is...

He's probably talking about the company with regards to the auditing of Enron back in 2001, and subsequently, the Enron Scandal in 2002 :p

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if only i knew who Arthur Andersen is...

From Wikipedia:

Arthur Andersen LLP, based in Chicago, was once one of the "Big Five" accounting firms among PricewaterhouseCoopers, Deloitte Touche Tohmatsu, Ernst & Young and KPMG, providing auditing, tax, and consulting services to large corporations. In 2002, the firm voluntarily surrendered its licenses to practice as Certified Public Accountants in the United States after being found guilty of criminal charges relating to the firm's handling of the auditing of Enron, an energy corporation based in Texas which had filed for bankruptcy in 2001 and later failed. The other national accounting and consulting firms bought most of the practices of Arthur Andersen. The verdict was subsequently overturned by the Supreme Court of the United States. However, the damage to its reputation has prevented it from returning as a viable business, though it still nominally exists.

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