Old man goes to the doctor


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An old Italian man goes to the doctor. He tells the doctor "Doc, I need my sperm count". The doctor replies "you're 80 years old, you don't need your sperm count". The old Italian man persists and eventually the doctor gives him a sample cup and tells him "go home and bring this back in a couple days"...

The old man comes back three days later and gives the doctor an empty sample. The doctor asked what happened. The old man says, "I tried my left hand... And nothing, I tried my right hand .. nothing. I went and asked my sweet wife. She tried her left hand... nothing. She tried her right hand... nothing. Doc, she even tried her mouth.... still nothing. So I went up to the woman who lives above us and Doc, let me tell you, this girl is fit. She tried her left hand... nothing. She tried her right hand... nothing. I even got her to try her mouth... Still nothing.

Spoiler

Doc, no matter what I tried, we couldn't get the lid off"

 

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