vbjr Posted December 15, 2005 Share Posted December 15, 2005 It all depends, if your love for her is deep, then give her another chance, but you gotta be strict with her, you cant be looking down while saying i am going to give you another chance. You gotta be tough so that she sees you mean business, that you are hurt and that if it ever happens again then she will have to leave forever and not see each other again. Its usually men who cheat on their wifes, or well we have that reputation, but nowdays women are doing it a lot, i think they might even do it more than us guys. We do it, because we are animals when it comes to sex, we gotta have that sexual relief within a time-limit. If the occassion is that she just wanted to have sex and there is no feelings for the guy, then think about it if you were in her shoes, it was just sex (remember we live in a sex age/century). If she had sex with him because she cares for him or loves him then thats a whole different story... she has to be dumped. Be strong and make a decision, if you decide to forgive her, then I admire your love for her. If you dont in the other hand, then do what you must, remember that nowadays there are around 3 girls for a man, so probabilities of you finding another woman you love is quite high, dont be scared and that thinking that if you leave her then you wont be able to find another woman that will make you feel special as she did, since this isnt true, any woman can make you feel special, you just gotta find the one you are compatible with. The other thing from what i read from your post is that you are mostly away on your job... So thinking about it, it was most likely to be a sexual need that she had. Just remember that if you forgive her, then she owes you bigtime for life ! and you can pretty much abuse your powers and do things with her you have never done before, either in bed or out of bed ;) OK sorry didnt mean to be funny there but anyways, hope you understand what I am trying to say. Good Luck. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mayamaniac Posted December 15, 2005 Share Posted December 15, 2005 Just ask yourself, "What would Chuck Norris do?" :laugh: Roundhouse kick her to the curb. And move on... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
benplace Posted December 15, 2005 Share Posted December 15, 2005 Whats her e-mail address? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wired57 Posted December 15, 2005 Share Posted December 15, 2005 no kids, dump her ass to the curb, she isn't worth you anymore. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lighthalzen Posted December 15, 2005 Share Posted December 15, 2005 You said she is 27, and still does not sound mature to me if she always go out partying and drinking. Not that I disagree with that, but it sounds like she is doing excessively. In other words, she might not find you very interesting. (Just saying my 2 cents, please do not feel offended.) Still, I would leave her since she is obviously not mature enough to hold a relationship. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pickleman Posted December 15, 2005 Share Posted December 15, 2005 maybe he has a bigger wee wee Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KeR Posted December 15, 2005 Share Posted December 15, 2005 Once a cheater, always a cheater. Honestly though if she cheated on you, that alone tells you how much she "loves" you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RightfulSpire Posted December 15, 2005 Author Share Posted December 15, 2005 You said she is 27, and still does not sound mature to me if she always go out partying and drinking. Not that I disagree with that, but it sounds like she is doing excessively. In other words, she might not find you very interesting. (Just saying my 2 cents, please do not feel offended.) Still, I would leave her since she is obviously not mature enough to hold a relationship. i think you hit the nail on the head with that, i am not home and she likes to have a good time..maybe just not compatible anymore, but i have never quit at anything, and this would be one of the biggest.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
midosm.com Posted December 15, 2005 Share Posted December 15, 2005 dude, totally pull your "i get to bonk a chick for free" card! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RightfulSpire Posted December 15, 2005 Author Share Posted December 15, 2005 dude, totally pull your "i get to bonk a chick for free" card! nothing is free, plus i will loose our one and only vehicle so cant pick up a whole heck of alot of girls. guess i can walk around in my coast guard uniform, girls love a guy in uniform right, with or without a car? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JohnMarsten Posted December 15, 2005 Share Posted December 15, 2005 i think you hit the nail on the head with that, i am not home and she likes to have a good time..maybe just not compatible anymore, but i have never quit at anything, and this would be one of the biggest.. This isn't quitting its doing the most rational thing and doing what is best for your life and hers, it will do niether of you any good to be in a relationship in which only one member is in it 100% while the other is not. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Devil Fish Posted December 15, 2005 Share Posted December 15, 2005 If you don't have trust, you don't have anything. This is no brainer. Ditch her, and move on. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nexus Posted December 15, 2005 Share Posted December 15, 2005 My first wife cheated on me as well. I always had a personal policy not to give second chances under the "cheating" category, but I was so in love with her that I did give her a second chance, but after months she never rebuilt the trust and I could never get the thought out of the back of my mind, So I left her. From what I heard, months later, she ended up with the guy she cheated with and pregnant, and he ended up cheating on her and gave her an STD. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lighthalzen Posted December 15, 2005 Share Posted December 15, 2005 I am sure you will find someone who is mature enough during your sailing, and if it is "love", the thing you own or not own would not be a matter. (Of course, you have to be able to feed her.) Move on and you will find someone in your life that wants your love. Also, do not ever go back to her if you do *ditch* her, or else they will feel more superior than you, as if you need her more than she need you. And this is exactly what's happening. Sorry if I am too blunt. :blush: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pacifica Posted December 15, 2005 Share Posted December 15, 2005 i caught my wife cheating, thing is i love her, should i give her a second chance? i think you've answered your own question..."thing is i love her." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RightfulSpire Posted December 15, 2005 Author Share Posted December 15, 2005 i want to thank everyone for some very good advice, though i am still so confused, hurt and afraid, and have no idea what to do yet i thank you. a few extra comments for some posters, i posted in here not because i am online al lthe time, not because i wanted a laugh, and yes maybe it is wrong or whatever, but situations like this need advice good bad or just plain humorous, while some let it build up never talk about it to anyone, and i have talked to everyo9ne from family to friends to coworkers to all yall neowinians, it helps alot whether you see it or not. if some of you knew what is going on in us guys who have had this happen you would understand. so there it is again ty all so much Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KeeperOfThePizza Posted December 15, 2005 Share Posted December 15, 2005 It really all depends.. I mean what if you had a nice home.. lived in a nice neighboorhood.. had kids.. would you really divorce? I wouldn't it's hell.. I went through it with my parents. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Subaru Posted December 15, 2005 Share Posted December 15, 2005 Too bad to hear all this My ex-GF did the same to me, after a 3 years long relationship ... i tried to giver her a second chance but she didnt love me anymore ... ohh the pain ... i loved her so much ... I had to let pass around 3 months to even start forgetting about her ... everything reminded me of her and we ddint see us AT ALL ... Then, another girl fell in love with me and i couldnt move off completely to my new relationship ... That one finished because of this lack of enthousiasm from my side .. i still thought about her from time time ... THEN, i met this other girl ... I just tell you: IT IS PAINFUL, YES but NOT IMPOSSIBLE and thare are MILLIONS of fishes in the pool ... and i assure you that MORE THAN ONE FITS US PEREFECTLY Move on ... i think it is over Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fmxer Posted December 15, 2005 Share Posted December 15, 2005 if she did it more than once, i'd say give her the flick. if it was only once, and she's really sorry try again...but if she does it after that then its pretty much over IMHO anyway Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AltecXP Posted December 15, 2005 Share Posted December 15, 2005 i am posting here because i want feed back is all, and yes had sex with him. see i am in the coast guard and gone 2-3 days out of the week. so she has free reign ya know, but i jjust feel lost without her, and there is always love i think there is a girl i will always have feelings for, and i miss her alot....but at the same time i brutaly hate her. its confusing as hell. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
-hurley18 Posted December 15, 2005 Share Posted December 15, 2005 Dude if she did it once, she can do it again. She did that cause she wants another men. sorry to tell you this but no i wouldnt give her another chance. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
+virtorio MVC Posted December 15, 2005 MVC Share Posted December 15, 2005 I'd be so devistated if I found out my wife/girlfriend was cheating on me. I wouldn't give her a second chance, you say you feel lost without her, well I wonder if she feels the same about you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lighthalzen Posted December 15, 2005 Share Posted December 15, 2005 if she did it more than once, i'd say give her the flick. if it was only once, and she's really sorry try again...but if she does it after that then its pretty much over IMHO anyway Who doesn't make mistakes? But not that kind of mistake. If you can bear the pain if she ever cheated on you again, by all mean, give her another chance. But if you don't want to be hurt again, I would suggest you to move on. I'd be so devistated if I found out my wife/girlfriend was cheating on me. I wouldn't give her a second chance, you say you feel lost without her, well I wonder if she feels the same about you. I completely agree. Saying and acutally doing it is a completely different thing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gabureiru Posted December 15, 2005 Share Posted December 15, 2005 No second chance, make her suffer emotionally and mentally. Leave her nothing ($$$) not even her pride. Sorry to hear that... hope you found my advice just and reasonable...... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rvbfan Posted December 15, 2005 Share Posted December 15, 2005 Dude if she did it once, she can do it again. She did that cause she wants another men. sorry to tell you this but no i wouldnt give her another chance. Dam straight! Take her back if you want to keep going through this over and over again. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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