Choosing Virginity


Recommended Posts

This thread was doing fine until a couple people started insulting half the us population.

Come on. This thread has nothing to do with religion, how bush was elected, or what bill did in the white house. Let's show some maturity here people. And people say Christians are always the ones trying to throw their beliefs down people's throats.

Let's keep this on topic ok?

Personally I think it's great people are waiting until they are married to have sex. There is absolutely nothing good that comes from having sex before marriage. Glad to see some junior high/high school people are acting like adults.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Goodness me people...I just love these kinds of debates..people get so worked up over things.

I'm not a virgin and proud to admit it. Ive had a number of partners in my life and I'm happy with that. Ive treated all my partners with love and respect and have no regrets over any of my past relationships.

Im an older person (37) and have recently returned to university so I know what life was like twenty years ago and what it is like for young people now. Its not that different. People are having sex just as often (god my girlfriend is 21). The difference now is that precautions are higher on the agenda than when I was a kid.

I dont have a problem in waiting until marriage before having sex, thast a persons choice, but I think that many people are waiting for the wrong reasons. I was brought up a Catholic (but Ive since found common sense and rationality) and my girlfriend is a Christadelphian (hopefully she'll find common sense soon). The basis for abstaining from sex is that it is seen as a bad thing unless marriage is involved. There is no explanation as to why marriage makes it a better thing. The idea of turning sex into something evil and dirty is disgraceful and can and does cause many, many problems for people later in life. Its the attitude of people towards sex that is dirty and horrible. That attitude can be a extreme as the fool who roots everything in site without a sense of responsibilty or the moron who thinks sex is reserved for marriage and anyone who doesnt think that is evil/tainted/going to hell/dirty.

Sex outside of marriage is painted as dirty and sinful and is something that needs to 'looked down on' by the holy and god like people. What a crock...Sex is sex...its like breathing..its not dirty or unatural and should be embrassed as long as it is done sensibly.

This idea of waiting until marriage could also mean that some people are getting married for the wrong reasons. Lust could be clouding their judgement and they could easily be confusing lust with love and making the wrong decision.

Well thast my thirty cents or so.

Noddy

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I am waiting till marriage. I figure that I have something others don't and like knowing I know how to control myself, although it isn't easy. It makes me a stronger person not to give in. Good thing I will be engaged shortly and marriage isn't far off. ?

Good luck to all of you who are waiting. You can do it!

You talk like virginity can actually be manifested in a physical sense. Virginity is a social phenomenon - it is not a REAL quality you can ascribe yourself as having. If you don't have sex, that is your choice - but just know that it really DOESN'T make you a stronger person - at least in regards to evolution. In fact it decreases your chances of spreading your genes - which is really the only reason we are here. Now that doesn't mean I want to go out and have a bunch of kids, but don't mock people who believe that sex is natural (which it is) and healthy (which it is).

Personally I would HATE to have sex with a person only after I married them... I mean hell, what if they suck? I can't imagine a wedding night where 2 virgins have sex for the first time.. 1) OUCH for the girl - since the first time for most girls hurts like hell, and 2) how bloody fricking awkward..

And God schmod, you know Jebus was getting his groove on in the 18 missing years.. lol. :DD

Edit: And referring to Clinton as a "Scumbag president" is basically saying "I prefer an idiotic, childish, war-hungry, power-hungry, anti-peace, anti-environment, anti-diplomacy, anti-democracy president then a smart, educated, culture-concious president who has a healthy sex-drive."

It DOES make me a stronger person. Stronger as in "will," not a physical attribute. Also, don't even get me started on "evolution" as that theory is so flawed it isn't funny. And another thing. I never said sex wasn't "natural" or "healthy" and I never mocked anyone. I believe that sex is natural and healthy when marriage is apart of the equation. It certainly isn't healthy when you have had it with 10 different people whom you have no idea what STD's they have.

The only thing sex does for the unwed is create a welfare problem. Personally I don't like paying (as in taxes) for other people's children when they can't control there sexual urges. There is a reason God wanted us to save ourselves until marriage.

Also, personally I wouldn't want to have sex before marriage for the simple reason of STD's ... sure, everyone tells the truth when asked if they have an STD (sarcasticly said). Face it, they are as desperate for sex as you are, no matter what gender.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

i've read only few replies, but i don't see any reason waiting until marriage to have sex. I say this because i think life would be very boring without sex, some people would say well i'm a virgin and i have plenty of fun, well when you start having sex it'll be even more fun. A lot of ladies say they want to wait for marriage or want it to be very special the first time they do it. Well to make it special you don't have to wait for marriage, just have to find the right guy. Life will pass you by very quickly if you keep on waiting for things, in my opinion. Sex is releasing your biological tension. I won't say i'm on expert even though i had a loyal two and half year relationship, but i'd say after sex you are more relaxed and see things in different way if i could put it that way. Not to get off the subject, i honestly don't know why someone would wait for marriage and not have sex before marriage. I really don't see how much more "special" it is if you wait after marriage. I think its only religion reasons maybe. You can make your first sex special in many many ways without waiting for miarrage, anyways maybe i'm wrong on some points maybe not. Those are my 30c :)

edit: also about natural and physical poop. If you took sociology then ud know that sex raises self confidence, and that is a positive thing. More selfconfidence is better in my opinion. Of course it leads to many problems but it makes a world go aroudn if you think about it. I'm not saying that if you have a lot of sex ull think oh i'm better then him or i can do that job better cuz i have more or lots of sex, but just in general it raises confidence of a person, and i guess it makes a better person. anyways, i'll stop typing, maybe i'm just saing poop that dont make sence, but if you really think about it, it will.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

My input:

I had planned on waiting until marriage to have sex. Not because of religious reasons. It was a gift I wanted to give to my wife. But unfortunately I am not a virgin anymore. I have to say, I regret that day more than anything. If I could go back in time and change one thing that happened, that would be it. And ya know what, it really wasn't that great. It wasn't a big deal. And that's the kind of mindset high school kids have these days. Sex isn't a big deal anymore. But it really is.

Why is there such a thing as sex? Obviously the reason is to have kids. To continue your lineage. Why have sex with a person if you don't intend to have kids with them? I don't have to have sex to have fun. I wouldn't describe sex as fun anyway. Video games are fun. Watching movies are fun. I don't consider sex and video games to be on the same plane. Sex is a physical and mental commitment whether you realize it or not.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

i've read only few replies, but i don't see any reason waiting until marriage to have sex. I say this because i think life would be very boring without sex, some people would say well i'm a virgin and i have plenty of fun, well when you start having sex it'll be even more fun. A lot of ladies say they want to wait for marriage or want it to be very special the first time they do it. Well to make it special you don't have to wait for marriage, just have to find the right guy. Life will pass you by very quickly if you keep on waiting for things, in my opinion. Sex is releasing your biological tension. I won't say i'm on expert even though i had a loyal two and half year relationship, but i'd say after sex you are more relaxed and see things in different way if i could put it that way. Not to get off the subject, i honestly don't know why someone would wait for marriage and not have sex before marriage. I really don't see how much more "special" it is if you wait after marriage. I think its only religion reasons maybe. You can make your first sex special in many many ways without waiting for miarrage, anyways maybe i'm wrong on some points maybe not. Those are my 30c :)

edit: also about natural and physical poop. If you took sociology then ud know that sex raises self confidence, and that is a positive thing. More selfconfidence is better in my opinion. Of course it leads to many problems but it makes a world go aroudn if you think about it. I'm not saying that if you have a lot of sex ull think oh i'm better then him or i can do that job better cuz i have more or lots of sex, but just in general it raises confidence of a person, and i guess it makes a better person. anyways, i'll stop typing, maybe i'm just saing poop that dont make sence, but if you really think about it, it will.

Sex may raise self-confidence in certain people but mine is plenty high without it. It all depends on the person and their environment. Everone is different and gains confidence in different ways.

Religion may be a big reason why some people abstain but it isn't always the reason. I know plenty of aethists who abstain for other reasons like, not having to worry about STD's and accidental pregnancy to name a few. Oh, and I don't believe I am better than anyone else for abstaining. I just think it is wrong not to wait. To clearify, hate the sin, not the sinner. And yes, having sex out of wedlock is a definate sin. Go ahead and flame me. At least I know where I stand and am not afraid to say it. Did I mention I have plenty of self-confidence?

Link to comment
Share on other sites

edit: also about natural and physical poop. If you took sociology then ud know that sex raises self confidence, and that is a positive thing. More selfconfidence is better in my opinion. Of course it leads to many problems but it makes a world go aroudn if you think about it. I'm not saying that if you have a lot of sex ull think oh i'm better then him or i can do that job better cuz i have more or lots of sex, but just in general it raises confidence of a person, and i guess it makes a better person. anyways, i'll stop typing, maybe i'm just saing poop that dont make sence, but if you really think about it, it will.

I've taken Sociology classes. I was a sociology major. You are somewhat right, but yet somewhat wrong. Sex does not raise self confidence, but people use sex to comfort themselves or to make themselves feel better temporarily. Temporarily is the key word. It's like a drug. It may give you a high, but it wears off quite quickly.

Quoting from my friends that do have sex, they equate it to drinking. Others do it, and it LOOKS like fun, so they decide to do it. The the morning after, EVERY TIME they regret it. I'm sure some of you know what it's like to have a hangover. I've heard it's pretty nasty. But yet they keep drinking because "others are doing it". People don't have sex because they think it's fun or it gives them self confidence. People have sex because either a) they think they are in love or b) everyone else is doing it. Peer pressure.

EDIT: I don't know what Jstphish's core beliefs are, but I agree with him totally on this. Honestly when I was a virgin, i did think I was better than others who weren't. I saw them losing their viriginity, and I pitied them. Quite a turn of events I must say.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Also, don't even get me started on "evolution" as that theory is so flawed it isn't funny.

Lets start another thread...what are the flaws in Evolution exactly? and more importantly..Whats the alternative?

The Bible..talk about a flawed theory..

Creationism..just as flawed..

This is getting interesting

Noddy

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Why is there such a thing as sex? Obviously the reason is to have kids. To continue your lineage. Why have sex with a person if you don't intend to have kids with them? I don't have to have sex to have fun. I wouldn't describe sex as fun anyway. Video games are fun. Watching movies are fun. I don't consider sex and video games to be on the same plane. Sex is a physical and mental commitment whether you realize it or not.

Nicely said.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I wouldn't describe sex as fun anyway. Video games are fun. Watching movies are fun. I don't consider sex and video games to be on the same plane. Sex is a physical and mental commitment whether you realize it or not.

I agree with you about the commitment but...

You must not be doing it right if you think sex is no fun. Maybe you should ease up on the video games... Those aren't exactly healthy for you, you know.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

lets not flame anyone, this is peoples opinions, i agree with you. I'm just saing the ONLY thing i see for people not having sex before marriage is religion, which is nothing wrong with it. But there are some people that just think that it will be more "special" when they get married, which i think is soo wrong. Cuz it just has to be in the right time, mood, and everything together, not after u get married or something, i mean sex is an art in a way, you can work on it and make it so much better then at a certain time for example, it'll be more "special" after marriege, thats just stupid ass excuse. my opinion anyways.

and about STD's well i think we are all grown here and know that protection comes first before the fun, anyone not using it, is just plain stupid and shouldn't even have the privalege of having sex.

edit: didnt see all the new replies while typing this, but anyways. It all depends on how we look at it, some people might sex is no fun at all, why? well many reason, because maybe they want to be very passionate and they concetrate to much or worry about other things. i'd say to relax to those people and try to enjoy it. Also you can look at sex in many different ways as you all know. Basicly its very SERIOUS but its very fun. Thats why some people refer to you as an adult after you lose ur virginity.

Edited by DiEMOS
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Also, don't even get me started on "evolution" as that theory is so flawed it isn't funny.

Lets start another thread...what are the flaws in Evolution exactly? and more importantly..Whats the alternative?

The Bible..talk about a flawed theory..

Creationism..just as flawed..

This is getting interesting

Noddy

Look, I didn't mean to get started on evolution. Let's drop it now.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Does that mean that if sex is only for making children then even in marriage you only have sex when you want to concieve a child. That means very littel sex even in marriage people.

Noddy

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Does that mean that if sex is only for making children then even in marriage you only have sex when you want to concieve a child. That means very littel sex even in marriage people.

Noddy

i think we should drop the subject on "sex is only for making children". Cuz i think we would all agree thats bullpoop.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Does that mean that if sex is only for making children then even in marriage you only have sex when you want to concieve a child. That means very littel sex even in marriage people.

Noddy

Yes sex is meant for procreation. Whether a married couple has sex or not, that's up to them. I was saying that since sex's primary outcome is kids, why would you even consider doing it with someone who you didn't want to have kids with. Since no matter how much protection you do have, there is always a chance.

intensityx said:

You must not be doing it right if you think sex is no fun. Maybe you should ease up on the video games... Those aren't exactly healthy for you, you know.

You were the one who said sex was fun. I just said video games were fun as well, which by your statement, means sex and video games are of the same importance. Since you lowered sex to merely just "fun", it can't be that great. Thereby, you have sex just for fun, with no seriousness involved.

Sex isn't exactly healthy for you either, in certain circumstances.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

lets not flame anyone, this is peoples opinions, i agree with you. I'm just saing the ONLY thing i see for people not having sex before marriage is religion, which is nothing wrong with it. But there are some people that just think that it will be more "special" when they get married, which i think is soo wrong. Cuz it just has to be in the right time, mood, and everything together, not after u get married or something, i mean sex is an art in a way, you can work on it and make it so much better then at a certain time for example, it'll be more "special" after marriege, thats just stupid ass excuse. my opinion anyways.

and about STD's well i think we are all grown here and know that protection comes first before the fun, anyone not using it, is just plain stupid and shouldn't even have the privalege of having sex.

I agree, we shouldn't flame and I do respect people opinions. I retract the "go ahead and flame me" statement. I am at least that mature.

As for the STD comment, even using a protection you have a 1% chance of getting an STD if your partner has one. 1% may not sound like much of a chance but when you think of how many people are on the earth it is huge. Statistically and hypothetically speaking, if there are 6 billion people on the earth and half the population has an STD then 60 million people will get an STD (Well, that's if I did my math right). Of course, I know that half of the population doesn't have an STD, remember this is hypothetical. I am just trying to show that there is a bigger chance of getting an STD than what is usually thought.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Does that mean that if sex is only for making children then even in marriage you only have sex when you want to concieve a child. That means very littel sex even in marriage people.

Noddy

i think we should drop the subject on "sex is only for making children". Cuz i think we would all agree thats bullpoop.

I guarantee we all don't agree. What exactly is sex for then? I mean, the main purpose of sex is to have kids. What do you think sex is for exactly? Does it mow the lawn, or pay the bills, or give you good grades?

EDIT: What do some of you think sex is for? Why is there even a thing as "sex"? Is it just something that's fun? Why risk your lives when there are things on earth that are more fun

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Sex is not meant only for procreation..it has many many other functions too..soem good some bad.

Its a sign of closeness, of affection, of dominance, it can be used to fix your place in society and theres probably a zillion other reasons for sex.

We just need to look at all the other animals in the world (yes people we are just animals too) and see that it is not just used for procreation...and thats no bullpoop :D

Noddy

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Does that mean that if sex is only for making children then even in marriage you only have sex when you want to concieve a child. That means very littel sex even in marriage people.

Noddy

i think we should drop the subject on "sex is only for making children". Cuz i think we would all agree thats bullpoop.

I guarantee we all don't agree. What exactly is sex for then? I mean, the main purpose of sex is to have kids. What do you think sex is for exactly? Does it mow the lawn, or pay the bills, or give you good grades?

Yes, but you have to remember it also relieves stess ... and a great deal of it.

It's 2:05am here and I have class tomorrow. G'night all. Happy commenting.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Does that mean that if sex is only for making children then even in marriage you only have sex when you want to concieve a child. That means very littel sex even in marriage people.

Noddy

i think we should drop the subject on "sex is only for making children". Cuz i think we would all agree thats bullpoop.

I guarantee we all don't agree. What exactly is sex for then? I mean, the main purpose of sex is to have kids. What do you think sex is for exactly? Does it mow the lawn, or pay the bills, or give you good grades?

Yes, but you have to remember it also relieves stess ... and a great deal of it.

It's 2:05am here and I have class tomorrow. G'night all. Happy commenting.

So does soft music, or watching the stars, or whatever.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Yes sex is meant for procreation.  Whether a married couple has sex or not, that's up to them.  I was saying that since sex's primary outcome is kids, why would you even consider doing it with someone who you didn't want to have kids with.  Since no matter how much protection you do have, there is always a chance.

i dont agree with you on that. sex's primary outcome IS kids thats true. but why WOULDNT you consider to have sex even if you dont want to have kids, thats the question. I think that even some studies it proves that its good to have sex, not a lot.

i agree with Noddy by his reply what sex is for.

oh and about STD's, you said there is 1% of getting them, well isnt there a risk in everything, there is 1% you can get hit by a car, maybe even more, you know, i mean 1% for anything you could say. Plus i would say most people who get stds are the people who have unprotected sex. and all taht you counted, Africa is resposible for a big %.

word of the day. bullpoop << :p

edit: comment to superfula, i'm wondering how old you are ... and if you are still a virgin. lets leave it at that ;) no offence. but i'm sure most if not all will disagree with you, but thats your opinion even if i think its stupid :ninja: :huh: :woot:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

QUOTE (Jstphish @ Dec 4 2002, 02:06)

QUOTE (superfula @ Dec 4 2002, 02:03)

QUOTE (DiEMOS @ Dec 4 2002, 01:57)

QUOTE (Noddy765 @ Dec 4 2002, 07:53)

Does that mean that if sex is only for making children then even in marriage you only have sex when you want to concieve a child. That means very littel sex even in marriage people.

Noddy

i think we should drop the subject on "sex is only for making children". Cuz i think we would all agree thats bullpoop.

I guarantee we all don't agree. What exactly is sex for then? I mean, the main purpose of sex is to have kids. What do you think sex is for exactly? Does it mow the lawn, or pay the bills, or give you good grades?

Yes, but you have to remember it also relieves stess ... and a great deal of it.

It's 2:05am here and I have class tomorrow. G'night all. Happy commenting.

So does soft music, or watching the stars, or whatever.

I really wanted to see how many quotes you could get in one window.

In some circumstances sex can actually make you healthier than abstaining. I remember an article from New Scientist many moons ago on a study that compared the health of a group of people involved in regular sex vs a grouip of people who had little or no sex.

Apparently the group that had regular sex fell ill less often than the other groups.

From memory the theory is that the constant challenge to your immune system from the other person endemic flora and fauna, meant that it was always primed and ready to fight infections. Those that dont have sex have a down regulated immune system that may not be able to cope with handling some diseases.

Oh yeah,,it can improve your grades. After having no sex here...I'm ata University that is 3500 km from home...for the first 2.5 years (except fopr holidays at home), I finally got a new girlfriend at the beggining of this year.. My grades in the first semester were the best I've ever got...

and again...thats no bullpoop :blink:

Noddy

Link to comment
Share on other sites

This topic is now closed to further replies.
  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.