Star Trek "Enterprise" being completely reworked


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They didn't abandon ship because it was a bad show. They mutinied because it was an epically wretched show, one preferable only to a flogging by Nurpian Slime Squids.

So last winter, the creators met and measured the crater into which they'd written themselves. Verdict: pretty deep.

Here's what they came up with:

This season, starship Enterprise will be on a singular mission, saving the Earth because the Xindi want to fry it like a Labor Day hamburger.

The creators got this idea from researching the success of "Star Trek" movies and finding the most popular ones were about the pending annihilation of Earth. Remember the one with the whales? Ha! Trick question. If you do, you're too old to be watching UPN. Flip to CBS.

They decided that Jolene Blalock, the va-va-voom Vulcan who is the alien embodiment of an emotionless "your-call-is-being-answered-by-Audix" recording, should tart up a little. They're giving her new hair and letting her out of that pantsuit she's been painted into for two seasons.

Finally, they're creating aliens that aren't bipedal creatures who look like neighbor kids in Halloween costumes from Eckerd's. Look for Xindi reptiles, Xindi water critters, Xindi sloths. Many are computer-generated, which may trim the yawn factor a bit.

If an adjustment in course can save "Enterprise" and the Star Trek franchise, I say good. We shall wait and see. But it may be high time to retire the formula, to put the future away while it still has a storied past.

http://www.charlotte.com/mld/observer/news/6371087.htm

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They decided that Jolene Blalock, the va-va-voom Vulcan who is the alien embodiment of an emotionless "your-call-is-being-answered-by-Audix" recording.

:D :D

Thats the funniest thing I've heard all day!!

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the first two seasons of Enterprise completely sucked, if this season doesn't shape up, i'm not going to watch it ever again.

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I think people are expecting it par up with some of the greats like Star Trek or TNG, it isn't going to happen. Gene is long died and so is his vision, Berman and those guys are not the same people that used to write for the Star Trek series.

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to save the franchise they just need to fire berman (or kill him what ever is easier) and get the writers of ds9 in and they will save it

i second that, the last few series of ds9 was star trek at its best.

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i stopped watching this show half way through the season. the only thing that kept me watching was the temporal cold war because it involved characters from the far future heh.

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I really liked Enterprise, but I agree it had some flaws. Some eps just sucked. I really hope this will improve the quality, They should make Archer less of a goody goody, which slowly he's learning.

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I hate Enterprise with a passion. I am a fan of ST:TOS, ST:TAS, ST:TNG, ST:DS9, ST Movies 2, 4, 6 and 8.

Never watched the first 2 season except the Series Premiere. I loved when they began the creators was saying this will be about the birth of the Federation and Starfleet, blah, blah, blah. But all we got was some time war (which I believe strongly will push a big RESET button).

You know if they were really following Star Trek history. This year would have been the start of the Earth-Romulan War.

And Jolene Blalock? They had to bring a lower version of 7 of 9 to the show. I remember one interview she had which she was glad to be with these "young" actors and not with the other Star Trek shows. Perhaps she knew she can't act as good as Patrick Stewart? Bah.

Everything you believe with Star Trek has gone down the tubes.... :angry:

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"Enterprise" has completely torn away from the mold Gene set. Instead of friendly aliens and scientific discoveries, it's turned into a baddy of the day series. Now they have them saving the Earth...just how many seasons can they do this for? :rolleyes:

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to save the franchise they just need to fire berman (or kill him what ever is easier) and get the writers of ds9 in and they will save it

Agreed! I second that!

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This wont work, it's a rip off of the Babylon 5 Sequel "Crusade" trying to find a cure for the plaque the Shadows Friends (cant remember their name) hit earth with. It was an interesting idea and the show had a following because of B5, but when TNT(TV station) and JMS (the Shows writer and B5 creator) got into a conflict on how to write SciFi TV Shows Crusade was cancelled.

I didnt mind Enterprise, but there were very few episodes and toooooooooo many repeats

like they would show 5 New episodes and then repeat them 3x each episode, then show 5 more new episodes and repeat those.

The best Star Trek TV show imho was "Deep Space 9" well written, good story, good cast although I hated some parts like that other dimension with Characters playing differnet roles.

but the war with the Dominion was ok, one cant help see the similarities with B% and Star Trek both space stations at war with an Evil Alien Race.

This new enterprise should be interesting too watch,whenever it comes back on TV and not show repeats galore.

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Agreed! I second that!

As do I. Ira Steven Behr is the man. Likewise, the last 5 years of DS9 was most excellent. I.S.B. took the DS9 helm after season 2.

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I REALLY hope this idea works for Enterprise. The show is on right now and once again I'm not watching it. I hate that. Berman needs to be used for target practice because he's completely screwed it up. I wish Jolene Blalock had never been on the show; the cat suit dumbs the show down and no one wears that kind of stuff if they want comfort and functionality.

Enterprise should have been a really cool show but instead it depresses me. :cry:

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I really liked TNG, DS9 and the first three seasons of VGR. Enterprise is a good idea and its not bad. I don't really know what the writers and creators hope to accomplish by putting them on a one season mission. Are they just going to back to the normal routine when season 4 starts (if there even is one), or just have a mission a season until they call it quits?

I don't really care where they go with the series. Its a nice one hour break from the reality crap, stupid sitcoms, and boring dramas that network TV is loaded with nowadays.

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