Subject: ALCOHOL WARNING


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Due to increasing products liability litigation, American liquor

manufacturers have accepted the FDA's suggestion that the following warning

lables be placed immediately on all varieties of alcohol containers:

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may leave you

wondering what the hell happened to your bra and panties.

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WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may make you think you are

whispering when you are not.

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WARNING: The consumption of alcohol is a major factor in dancing

like a retard.

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WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to tell your

friends over and over again that you love them.

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WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to think you can sing.

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WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe that

ex-lovers are really dying for you to telephone them at four in the

morning.

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WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may make you think you can

logically converse with other members of the opposite sex without

spitting.

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WARNING: The consumption of alcohol is the leading cause of

Inexplicable rug burns on the forehead, knees and lower back.

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WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may create the illusion that

you are tougher, smarter, faster and better looking than most people.

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WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may lead you to think people

are laughing WITH you.

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WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause pregnancy.

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WARNING: the crumsumpten of alcahol may Mack you tink you can

tipe real gode

:laugh: :beer: + :martini: = :sleepy:

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WARNING: the crumsumpten of alcahol may make a really ugly women... look really good!

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WARNING: the crumsumpten of alcahol may make u think "Mr Happy" can stand up.... when infact "Mr Happy" ain't go'in no where!

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WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause strange people,

animals or objects to appear in your bed in the morning. :woot:

Edited by SunnyB
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WARNING: the crumsumpten of alcahol may make you think everyone is singing WITH you, while in-fact, you're singing by yourself.

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WARNING: the crumsumpten of alcahol may make a really ugly women... look really good!

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WARNING: the crumsumpten of alcahol may make u think "Mr Happy" can stand up.... when infact "Mr Happy" ain't go'in no where!

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Those are Great! (Y)

Thanks for adding your warnings! :laugh:

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WARNING: The consumption of alcohol can make you think that others care about how drunk you are.

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.... Recalls first year of university ......

The frosh week was the only binge drinking I've done in years. I can say I've been through them all except for causing the pregnancy.

The tip thing is a bit off though. Ever been drinking w/ a friend and the waitress is reall hot? I've thrown in a $10 tip small tabs before. Hey, I'm helping them stay hot. :yes:

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