Microsoft kills Santa Claus

Microsoft has killed Santa Claus today, after an unsatisfactory attempt to restrain the North Pole-based jolly old elf from instant messaging children about oral sex.

Although Redmond has been challenged by compassion in the past, this appears to be the first time on record it has out-and-out killed the very manifestation of goodwill.

Father Christmas was subject to some controversy this year when given the seasonal ID northpole@live.com on MSN messenger. While mostly sticking to an approved and traditional regimen of asking children what they want for Christmas, the mere mention of pizza would send him into a provocative froth about love-making of the mouth.

Microsoft informed us about their troubling decision to destroy the spirit of Christmas this morning.

View: Full Article @ El Reg

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24 Comments

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Is this fake? Because it sure sounds fake. I still don't really get what it was... I'm getting it was some sort of IM robot that was saying dirty things?
How long has it been out there? Who made it?

The Register's articles are always written in a incredibly spiteful and patronising way I just can't bring myself to read it.

The guy keep repeating eat it, thats a nonsensical conversation with a bot if you ask me. After all its a bot, and the answers this guy was giving it were stupid. The bot is there for little kids to talk about their gifts. Not some old guy with nothing better to do but talk about eating something (whatever "it" might have been). So whos smarter, the bot or the human?

I for one agree with NeoBond on this one.

mongoloid said,
The guy keep repeating eat it, thats a nonsensical conversation with a bot if you ask me. After all its a bot, and the answers this guy was giving it were stupid. The bot is there for little kids to talk about their gifts. Not some old guy with nothing better to do but talk about eating something (whatever "it" might have been). So whos smarter, the bot or the human?

I for one agree with NeoBond on this one.

From your post, it seems you think that an old-aged reporter for The Register discovered this.

This was brought to the attention of The Register when a reader found his nieces in a chat.

Reg reader Iain blew the whistle on the foul-mouthed software after his nieces - just 11 and 13 years old - were drawn into a chat about oral sex.
http://www.theregister.co.uk/2007/12/03/santa_filth_outrage/

It seems that kids will enter the strangest things and get even stranger responses.

But, yeah, blame an online reporter for Microsoft's initial blunder for including responses involving "oral sex" in the first place. And blame them more for Microsoft being unable to fix it after they were told.

Bad, naughty, evil reporter!

Oh.. I thought this was some sort of joke Christmas article, but it's actually about an IM bot. That definitely could have been explained a little better.

It's the way it was written though. Microsoft did nothing overly wrong here. As stated, they took action the moment they found out about the issue. Good on them. Yet the Register continues to knock them and knock them hard over it. Making statements like "Microsoft has killed Santa Claus" and "it has out-and-out killed the very manifestation of goodwill" is a little harsh. Also, to make a statement like the santa was "instant messaging children about oral sex" makes the situation sound a lot worse than it really was. The santa merely states that it wants to talk about something OTHER THAN oral sex but the Register makes it sound like it was actually having full blown discussions on the topic. All in all its just a crappy article by the Register written solely to attract readers.

madkingsoup said,
Why is this El Reg's fault? As far as I can see, they have merely reported a story.

They provoked a bot to expose hidden Easter eggs.

Seriously though. The way the whole situation was conducted screams INTERNET NEWS WHORES.

Oh come on guys, this is hilarious. That's probably given more people Christmas cheer than any properly censored automated Santa ever could! The guy who programmed that should get a medal.

Typical of someone [Microsoft] attempting to do a good thing and others [The Register] doing what they can to circumvent the good intention. Shame..

The Register has done nothing wrong here, Neobond. Were it not for them, more children might have talked with this dirty Santa.

Oh, I agree!

Shame on The Reg to find this (or, more likely find out about this from another source, say, their teenage kids) and publish it!
Shame on The Reg for reporting it to Microsoft to be fixed!
Shame on The Reg for Microsoft not being able to fix it to Microsoft's satisfaction!

Shame all around for The Reg.

</rant>

markjensen said,
Oh, I agree!

Shame on The Reg to find this (or, more likely find out about this from another source, say, their teenage kids) and publish it!
Shame on The Reg for reporting it to Microsoft to be fixed!
Shame on The Reg for Microsoft not being able to fix it to Microsoft's satisfaction!

Shame all around for The Reg.

</rant>


Oh snap...MOD WARS! But I'm pretty sure you'll lose. As a matter of fact I'll guarantee it.

I'm completely shocked that Neobond is defending Microsoft.