Found this http://dimio.altervista.org/eng/ the program is called DSyncronize
DSynchronize is a stand-alone utility that let you periodically synchronize two or more folders on Hard Disk, Floppy Disk, LAN, USB Key, CD-DVD (with packet writing software) and FTP server.It is also possible to specify the time and the day to schedule the synchronization to run, and to create some additional "filters" for other factors.Real-Time sync is also supported.
I first did a "normal sync" because realtime sync is apparently experimental in the program and copying large amounts of files in Real Time mode for the first time can crash the program.
Can not get it to install as a service, and run on startup doesn't seem to work either so I created a Task for it in Administrator Tools > Task Scheduler with the argument /MINIMIZE (which works) but maybe because it's an oldish program with no real Windows 8 support? I dunno.
It didn't seem to want to sync the whole C:\Users\Steve structure over, so I added the folders manually in \Steve (skipping some I don't need) which does properly sync everything including sub folders (which you can filter)..
Not using hardly any memory or CPU either,, but I'll keep an eye on it, just rebooted.
Oh, and it's free, but you can donate if this tool helps you. I'm holding off for a bit to see if it continues to do the job properly.