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Posted

I'm a shy person and am looking for exercises to get rid of it once and for all. After long hours of googling, many sites suggested that self-hypnosis CDs are a great treatment. I've read that shyness is caused by negative thoughts in the subconscious mind, which is true. I always worry that bad things will happen, that I'll look like a fool and that people will reject me for who I am. So, many sources said that with repeat listening to self-hypnosis CDs or MP3s, it will help change those negative thoughts in the subconscious mind and will turn them into positive thoughts. Thus, I will start feeling less nervous and more confident around others once those positive thoughts fully sink into the subconcious mind.

Is this really true? Do self-hypnosis CDs really work? If so, can someone recommend some good CDs I can try that are not too expensive?

Thanks!

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Posted

It may.

Hypnotherapy would be better, tho more expensive.

A generic CD may not work, because your shyness can be based on deeper, unrecognized beliefs about yourself.

You may believe, for example that you are not 'good enough' for some reason.

You may not be comfortable with your looks.

You could feel guilty about some past event.

Hypnosis is a way to change one's Beliefs, which in turn change your experience.

Best of luck to you ... ;)

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Posted

[quote]
s this really true? Do self-hypnosis CDs really work?
[/quote]

Almost anything can work if you believe it will work. Your beliefs are the key. If you believe you can overcome shyness you can.

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Posted

Thanks guys! I'll give it a try. Can't hurt.
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Posted

Why don't you come update the forum after trying - let us know if you feel less shy.
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[quote name='DaDude' timestamp='1362494547' post='595559060']
Thanks guys! I'll give it a try. Can't hurt.
[/quote]

Someone actually suggested to defeat shyness one must put one's self out there.
I would actually suggest looking into a course on Public Speaking.... start out with a small crowd then work your way up there.
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[quote name='redvamp128' timestamp='1362512110' post='595559722']
Someone actually suggested to defeat shyness one must put one's self out there.
I would actually suggest looking into a course on Public Speaking.... start out with a small crowd then work your way up there.
[/quote]

I can do public speaking. I had to do it countless times in college and still do it now at my job. I can do it as long as I have notes in front of me.

What I can't do is strike a conversation with people I just met or ask a girl out on a date. That's the issue I'm having.

[quote name='tim_s' timestamp='1362509368' post='595559658']
Why don't you come update the forum after trying - let us know if you feel less shy.
[/quote]

Will do. I'll report back in a month, since it takes about that time for the self hypnosis to take effect. Sometimes it's longer depending on the person. But yeah, I'll be happy to keep you guys updated.

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Posted

[quote name='DaDude' timestamp='1362529850' post='595560306']
[size=4]What I can't do is strike a conversation with people I just met or ask a girl out on a date. That's the issue I'm having.[/size]
[/quote]

A friend of mine had this issue and he made it his goal to talk to someone every day. He started with people he didn't know and worked up to friends he had a hard time talking to. After a few weeks he saw how easy it was.
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I can talk to someone if I happen to find something interesting to talk about. But when I just meet a stranger and don't know what his/her interests are or can't find something in common to talk about, then OMG, it's awkward silence between the two of us. Ever seen that episode of "Friends" where Ross and Mike (Phoebe's husband) get together at Ross' place. Both of them just sat there in awkward silence and couldn't find anything in common to talk about. Well, that's what it's like with me. Sometimes I try to bring up something to talk about, but the other person is not interested in talking about it. Very awkward.
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Posted

Pheromones!

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Posted

you know what works best, friends who drag you out of your comfort zone from time to time. And talking to strangers is an art, practice it, and don't expect every conversation to be perfect. If there are a lot of awkward silences it just means that person might not be a good match. Try someone else, better luck next time, and don't take it personal ;)

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Posted

Subliminal and learn while you sleep, or any medium similar has a pretty huge failure rate, as a surprisingly small number of the population is actually suseptible <spellcheck> to hypnotism.

My advise would be, get out of your comfort zone, talk to your closest friends, or family ask them to introduce you to someone they know, that you don't(doesn't matter if male or female) and build from there, depending on your level of shyness, it may take you from a few days, to acouple of weeks to build the confidence you're looking for, for whatever your shyness is preventing you from accomplishing. :)

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Posted

I can talk to someone if I happen to find something interesting to talk about. But when I just meet a stranger and don't know what his/her interests are or can't find something in common to talk about, then OMG, it's awkward silence between the two of us. Ever seen that episode of "Friends" where Ross and Mike (Phoebe's husband) get together at Ross' place. Both of them just sat there in awkward silence and couldn't find anything in common to talk about. Well, that's what it's like with me. Sometimes I try to bring up something to talk about, but the other person is not interested in talking about it. Very awkward.

One thing you can also do is learn to enjoy the silence sometimes rather than perceiving it as awkward. I personally would rather have some nice comfortable silence with a guy than him constantly yammering on. Obviously there should be a balance, and you want to be interesting, but every single second doesn't have to be filled with talking. If you have a drink in hand, take a slow sip of it and savour the taste. Enjoy being wherever you are at the moment, smile, relax, etc. People respond to happy, confident folks--and faking it til you make it totally works ;)

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Posted

I can talk to someone if I happen to find something interesting to talk about. But when I just meet a stranger and don't know what his/her interests are or can't find something in common to talk about, then OMG, it's awkward silence between the two of us. Ever seen that episode of "Friends" where Ross and Mike (Phoebe's husband) get together at Ross' place. Both of them just sat there in awkward silence and couldn't find anything in common to talk about. Well, that's what it's like with me. Sometimes I try to bring up something to talk about, but the other person is not interested in talking about it. Very awkward.

I know exactly how you feel, I wouldnt say shyness is really the word. I was shy but thankfully I am not so bad but I do find situations where I struggle to find conversations of interest that only seem to exacerbate the feeling of awkwardness as you are desperatly trying to find a common ground.

 

I would love to know if you do find things that help, I have tried forcing myself into the situations with people where I struggle for conversations and so far the only thing that helps me is alcohol :)

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Posted

I'm a shy person and am looking for exercises to get rid of it once and for all.

 

The best exercise is to try to realize that people only care about themselves so to speak.

 

So when you stand in front of group of people/strangers all shy and nervous, not able to say a word because you over-think what they may think about you, how they will react to what you'll say - stop and realize that at this very moment they don't think about you, on the contrary, they think about not looking shy and saying something dumb themselves!

 

As a first step, I'd suggest that you try to talk to old ladies at bus stops. Weather is always a safe topic and a good conversation starter.

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The best exercise is to try to realize that people only care about themselves so to speak.

 

So when you stand in front of group of people/strangers all shy and nervous, not able to say a word because you over-think what they may think about you, how they will react to what you'll say - stop and realize that at this very moment they don't think about you, on the contrary, they think about not looking shy and saying something dumb themselves!

 

As a first step, I'd suggest that you try to talk to old ladies at bus stops. Weather is always a safe topic and a good conversation starter.

 

'Are you trying to seduce me, young man?'

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Posted

'Are you trying to seduce me, young man?'

 

 

Did they tell you that? :D

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Posted

yes, hypnosis can easily cure shyness

 

 

regards

Mike

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Posted

I kind of agree. You need to listen to some of stuff by Hypnotica. Google it, Its only available on CD Baby if I remember correctly. I can 110% recommend this stuff. All the people I have recommend it to say that The Sphinx of Imagination is amazing and you can see changes in them personally but then again thats my opinion and its only you who can make the decision to try them for yourself and see.... 

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Posted

the only cure to shyness is to repeatdly put yourself in socially awkward situations, and forcing yourself to change.

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Posted

If it can... I will surely try it out! :)

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Posted

It cannot cure it. The obstacle you "remove" with the hypnosis will still be there after the hypnosis is gone, as you haven't actually dealt with it.

 

If you want to stop being shy, realize it means jack what others think about you. As long as you keep thinking it matters if someone rejects you for making a fool of yourself, you'll keep being shy.

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Posted

I can 100% say that for me - it did.  I used to be shy and awkward.  I used NLP (which is arguably related) and it solved all those issues.

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No, it can't cure it. It may help you cope with it better so you can learn to overcome it regularly, but it won't make it go away.

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