[Joke] A farmer and his bull


Rate this joke...  

31 members have voted

  1. 1. Funny or not?

    • Funny
      21
    • Not Funny
      10


Recommended Posts

The 80 year-old manager of a rodeo needed a new bull, so he perused the newspaper and found a farmer selling one. Upon contacting the farmer, he was informed that the bull would cost $1500. The manager agreed, and drove out with a vet to inspect the bull. The vet declared the bull to be healthy, so the manager purchased the bull.

Three months later, the bull suddenly went cross-eyed. The manager, in a panic, phoned the vet, who recommended he contact the farmer. So the manager phoned the farmer, who said to come on out, that he could fix the bull right up. When the manager arrived with the bull, the farmer went into the barn and returned with a rubber garden hose. The farmer proceeded to insert one end of the hose into the bull's anus, put his mouth to the other end, and blow hard. The bull's eyes instantly became un-cross-eyed. The farmer told the manager that it would be $50, so the manager paid the farmer.

Three months later, the manager noticed the bull had gone cross-eyed again, so he went to see the farmer again. The farmer repeated the routine, and charged him another $50.

Three months later, the manager again saw that the bull was cross-eyed. However, this time, instead of going to see the farmer, he grabbed his Newfie rodeo-hand and decided to do it himself. The Newfie and the manager went to the storage closet and grabbed a garden hose, and went to the bull. The manager said, "You go 'round in front and watch his eyes, and tell when he's fixed." So the Newfie went in front and the manager went behind, inserted the hose into the bull's anus, and blew as hard as he could. However, being 80, that wasn't hard enough, and despite blowing and blowing, he finally gave up. "You try blowing," said the manager to the Newfie. So the Newfie came to the back and the manager went in front.

After a few minutes of nothing happening, the manager went to see what the Newfiew was doing. He was shocked to see the Newfie removing the hose from the bull's ass. "What are you doing?!?" demanded the manager, "He's not fixed yet!"

The Newfie looked up and replied, "What? You think I'm going to put my lips on the same end you used?" :laugh: :D :rofl:

Edited by guylaroche
Link to comment
https://www.neowin.net/forum/topic/488578-joke-a-farmer-and-his-bull/
Share on other sites

This topic is now closed to further replies.
  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.
  • Posts

    • I can name 10x that on why not to switch.... It's funny outlook/office are going towards web app wrappers, and then MS is now preaching native apps again.... ugh can we just pick a lane and stay in it
    • Absolutely NOBODY has suggested such a conclusion. I am affirming the sober reality check that AV2's overall market adoption will take longer than AV1's adoption rate -- which, by the way, is the whole point of the article! While PCI-SIG is productive (on paper), other WGs have created all sorts of confusing progress plans that consumers have tuned-out of their improvements... HTML/W3C, USB, HDMI, BT, WIFI (ieee802.11) as a few other groups where spec naming conventions, split progress paths, overlapping ambitions... I'm not critiquing the AV specs group; I'm simply affirming that adoption for AV2 faces headwinds beyond the macroeconomics of it all.
    • Segra 1.5.2 by Razvan Serea Segra is a free, open-source OBS-powered game recorder offering fast gameplay capture, instant clips, AI highlights, deep game integration, and seamless uploads—perfect for gamers, streamers, and content creators. Lightweight, fast, zero bloat. Segra key features: Automatic Game Recording: Begin capturing gameplay the moment your game launches, with zero manual setup. Instant Clipping: Save important moments instantly using a customizable hotkey—perfect for highlights, montages, or quick shares. Segra AI Highlights: Let Segra automatically detect kills, assists, deaths, and key events to generate polished highlight reels without manual editing. Gameplay Uploads: Upload recordings and clips directly to Segra.tv for fast sharing and cloud access. Deep Game Integration: Enjoy advanced game-data tracking across hundreds of supported titles, enabling smart highlight generation and stat-informed clipping. High-Performance Capture: Record up to 4K at 144 FPS using OBS-powered technology with minimal performance impact, supporting NVENC, AMD VCE, and custom quality controls. Segra Editor: Edit recordings easily with timeline controls, segment management, and event-based navigation to build the perfect clip. Customization Options: Adjust hotkeys, output formats, storage paths, codecs, capture quality, and performance settings for a tailored recording experience. Segra 1.5.2 changelog: Settings: Added an Airplane Mode that hides account, login, and upload features. Storage: Added a button to migrate videos into the recording path after changing it. Import: Added auto-scroll and a highlight pulse to videos right after importing. Recording: Added graceful handling of low disk space and output failures, finalizing files safely with clear errors. Recording: Added a guard blocking recording when any drive exceeds 99% full. OBS: Removed the download timeout to support users with slow internet. Clips: Fixed an error modal incorrectly appearing when clip creation was cancelled. Settings: Fixed the content folder path not refreshing in the UI after changes. Updates: Improved error handling for multiple simultaneous update checks. Stability: Fixed a WebSocket reconnect loop that ran while the window was backgrounded. Dependencies: Updated project dependencies. Maintenance: Removed dead code, reduced duplication, and fixed several latent bugs. Download: Segra 1.5.2 | 73.1 MB (Open Source) View: Segra Homepage | Github | Screenshot Get alerted to all of our Software updates on Twitter at @NeowinSoftware
  • Recent Achievements

    • Very Popular
      s0nic69 earned a badge
      Very Popular
    • Collaborator
      Asgardi earned a badge
      Collaborator
    • Conversation Starter
      mobandz earned a badge
      Conversation Starter
    • Apprentice
      fernan99 went up a rank
      Apprentice
    • One Month Later
      nothanks earned a badge
      One Month Later
  • Popular Contributors

    1. 1
      +primortal
      472
    2. 2
      PsYcHoKiLLa
      246
    3. 3
      Skyfrog
      79
    4. 4
      FloatingFatMan
      69
    5. 5
      Michael Scrip
      60
  • Tell a friend

    Love Neowin? Tell a friend!