jnelsoninjax Posted July 19, 2008 Share Posted July 19, 2008 A woman decides to have a facelift for her 50th birthday. She spends $5,000 and feels pretty good about the results. On her way home, she stops at a news stand to buy a newspaper. Before leaving she says to the clerk, "I hope you don't mind my asking, but how old do you think I am?" "About 32," is the reply. "Nope! I'm exactly 50," the woman says happily. A little while later she goes into McDonald's and asks the counter girl the very same question. The girl replies, "I guess about 29." The woman replies, "Nope I'm 50." Now she's feeling really good about herself. She stops in a drug store on her way down the street. She goes up to the counter to get some mints and asks the clerk this burning question. The clerk responds, "Oh, I'd say 30." Again she proudly responds, "I am 50, but thank you." While waiting for the bus to go home, she asks an old man waiting next to her the same question. He replies, "Lady, I'm 78 and my eye sight is going. Although, when I was young, there was a sure way to tell how old a woman was. It sounds very forward, but it requires you to let me put my hands under your bra. Then, and only then can I tell you EXACTLY how old you are." They wait in silence on the empty street until curiosity gets the best of her. She finally blurts out, "What the hell, go ahead." He slips both of his hands under her blouse and begins to feel around very slowly and carefully. He bounces and weighs each breast...He gently pinches each nipple. He pushes her breasts together and rubs them against each other. After a couple of minutes of this, she says, "Okay, okay...How old am I?" He completes one last squeeze of her breasts, removes his hands, and says. "Madam, you are 50." Stunned and amazed, the woman says, "That was incredible, how could you tell?" The old man replies, "promise you won't get mad?" "I promise! I won't" she says. He replies, "I was behind you in line at McDonald's." Link to comment https://www.neowin.net/forum/topic/650091-joke-how-to-guess-a-womens-age/ Share on other sites More sharing options...
CrashG Posted July 19, 2008 Share Posted July 19, 2008 :rofl: funny Link to comment https://www.neowin.net/forum/topic/650091-joke-how-to-guess-a-womens-age/#findComment-589568001 Share on other sites More sharing options...
DemonicHawk Posted July 19, 2008 Share Posted July 19, 2008 haha, that was pretty good! Link to comment https://www.neowin.net/forum/topic/650091-joke-how-to-guess-a-womens-age/#findComment-589568017 Share on other sites More sharing options...
santiagof4 Posted July 19, 2008 Share Posted July 19, 2008 Hahaha nice one Link to comment https://www.neowin.net/forum/topic/650091-joke-how-to-guess-a-womens-age/#findComment-589568029 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Abhishek kapoor Posted July 20, 2008 Share Posted July 20, 2008 hahahahah ...very nice .... he took the benefit .. Link to comment https://www.neowin.net/forum/topic/650091-joke-how-to-guess-a-womens-age/#findComment-589569079 Share on other sites More sharing options...
suicide_pact Posted July 20, 2008 Share Posted July 20, 2008 Not bad. Link to comment https://www.neowin.net/forum/topic/650091-joke-how-to-guess-a-womens-age/#findComment-589569091 Share on other sites More sharing options...
DirtyLarry Veteran Posted July 20, 2008 Veteran Share Posted July 20, 2008 LOL Very Good. A classic. Link to comment https://www.neowin.net/forum/topic/650091-joke-how-to-guess-a-womens-age/#findComment-589569097 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rahul Posted July 20, 2008 Share Posted July 20, 2008 sneaky Link to comment https://www.neowin.net/forum/topic/650091-joke-how-to-guess-a-womens-age/#findComment-589569098 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Yuxi Posted July 20, 2008 Share Posted July 20, 2008 mmm 50-year-old breasts... :/ Link to comment https://www.neowin.net/forum/topic/650091-joke-how-to-guess-a-womens-age/#findComment-589569135 Share on other sites More sharing options...
ATGC Posted July 20, 2008 Share Posted July 20, 2008 :woot: Good one! Link to comment https://www.neowin.net/forum/topic/650091-joke-how-to-guess-a-womens-age/#findComment-589569196 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Impact Posted July 20, 2008 Share Posted July 20, 2008 sneaky old man Link to comment https://www.neowin.net/forum/topic/650091-joke-how-to-guess-a-womens-age/#findComment-589569206 Share on other sites More sharing options...
DrawLand Posted July 20, 2008 Share Posted July 20, 2008 haha :rofl: Link to comment https://www.neowin.net/forum/topic/650091-joke-how-to-guess-a-womens-age/#findComment-589569212 Share on other sites More sharing options...
NeoXY Posted July 20, 2008 Share Posted July 20, 2008 :rofl: lmfaoo Link to comment https://www.neowin.net/forum/topic/650091-joke-how-to-guess-a-womens-age/#findComment-589569219 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Avatar Viper Posted July 20, 2008 Share Posted July 20, 2008 hahaha... Link to comment https://www.neowin.net/forum/topic/650091-joke-how-to-guess-a-womens-age/#findComment-589569361 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sam Symons Veteran Posted July 20, 2008 Veteran Share Posted July 20, 2008 I like it :) Link to comment https://www.neowin.net/forum/topic/650091-joke-how-to-guess-a-womens-age/#findComment-589569370 Share on other sites More sharing options...
DELTETHISACCOUNT Posted July 20, 2008 Share Posted July 20, 2008 Perfect punchline, five stars! (Y) Link to comment https://www.neowin.net/forum/topic/650091-joke-how-to-guess-a-womens-age/#findComment-589569376 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tech Star Posted July 20, 2008 Share Posted July 20, 2008 Dam, that is smart! :laugh: Link to comment https://www.neowin.net/forum/topic/650091-joke-how-to-guess-a-womens-age/#findComment-589569377 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Andrew Lyle Global Moderator Posted July 20, 2008 Global Moderator Share Posted July 20, 2008 hahaha, excellent joke LOL Link to comment https://www.neowin.net/forum/topic/650091-joke-how-to-guess-a-womens-age/#findComment-589569678 Share on other sites More sharing options...
DrunknMunky Veteran Posted July 20, 2008 Veteran Share Posted July 20, 2008 Haha that was a good one (Y) Link to comment https://www.neowin.net/forum/topic/650091-joke-how-to-guess-a-womens-age/#findComment-589569723 Share on other sites More sharing options...
.thumb.png.b7089ebbdf00d96b3b92dddbd04bac02.png)
Recommended Posts