Breaking Off An Engagment Might Cost You

[Budious]

I doubt that verbal contracts have any legal/binding values. You have to have a physical signed paper

to have a proof before a judge.

No, in the US, there are many case precedents which say if party A promises some action that party B commits some action in preparation for party A fulfilling their offer, then they can be held liable for withdrawing an offer early.

A common case example cites a boat seller, who offers a price to a prospective buyer to be good for 3 days, the buyer makes a preparation to receive the boat by building a dock, but in the meantime, the seller sales to a higher bidder. This constitutes a breach of offer and can be liable in these circumstances. Of course, interpreting to apply to a engagement for marriage may be a bit of a stretch.

[_bobcat_ Veteran]

I'm not sure that the law should recognize that some verbal contracts are worth more than others.

Are verbal contracts fairly well accepted in some situations then? To me, it seems to be asking for trouble and complications.. (it's not something I know anything about).

Nah, I think you can live together before getting married with no problems. Flish and I did and had an agreement as to who gets what. We both know who will get what furniture and money and so on.

I think with the right people it can work out, I just think these two were totally the wrong people.

I don't think engagements should be used as verbal contracts and I don't think under breaking it, there should be penalties like this.

Yeah I've lived with my boyfried for a few years and we plan to marry in the next year or two. We are technically engaged now but haven't got a ring yet.. so I guess I have a biased view.

We actually don't *want* to be any more committed than we are yet, that's why we're not already married. But you know, if it all goes pear shaped, I'm not going to sue him because, I don't know, I could have gone and married someone else by now or gone to a different uni.. the idea is preposterous to me. You take risks in life, sometimes you fail, you have to learn to get over it and make better choices next time.

[S7un7]

Bottom Line.....No one forced the woman to quit her job and move somewhere else. She did that on her own.

The judge is a moron because now people in the same situation are going to sue thinking they can get revenge on the other person.

[Vykranth]

No, in the US, there are many case precedents which say if party A promises some action that party B commits some action in preparation for party A fulfilling their offer, then they can be held liable for withdrawing an offer early.

A common case example cites a boat seller, who offers a price to a prospective buyer to be good for 3 days, the buyer makes a preparation to receive the boat by building a dock, but in the meantime, the seller sales to a higher bidder. This constitutes a breach of offer and can be liable in these circumstances. Of course, interpreting to apply to a engagement for marriage may be a bit of a stretch.

I did not know that. That is kind of surprising for me: I always thought that people in the US liked formalized, signed, iron-clad binding agreements.

I do hope that it is overturned. It sets a bad precedent for anyone in a relationship.

Yup. I am looking forward to the day I am getting sued for emotional distress because I am 10 minutes late for my date ... :p

[dreamz Veteran]

i don't see how she can sue him because of a broken promise. in terms of the law, what did he do wrong? if a woman promises to be with her boyfriend forever, and then breaks up with him, can he sue her?

as for her sacrifices, those are irrelevant. she didn't have to give up her job, etc. they could have made some sort of arrangement. besides, not everything will go your way. that's not a justification for a lawsuit.

[torrentthief]

i completely agree with your dreamz! No law was broken therefore it shouldn't have even got to court. What is the suing culture coming to!

[b0m8er]

so what's next - are we going to sue our wife/husband for cheating on us? are we going to sue each other for lying? That's just ridiculous!

[»X«]

So what you guys are saying is that a guy can propose to a woman tell her to quit her job and move in with him . and the guy breaks it off and nothing will happen even though she had a high paying job ?

Pretty much. Why should the courts with bothered with these 2 peoples problem. More fool her if she left her job for this guy. He asked her back in October and proposed. Barely any time based before a wedding date was set and now she whinges about it?

Not at all saying what he did was right either by the way.

[dreamz Veteran]

^that's how i see it. if i quit my job to move in with a girl and then she breaks up with me, can i run to the courts and ask for compensation? i don't think i should be able to do that. i knew the risks going in. what do i do then? i just absorb the cost (which is what i should have prepared for in this event, anyway), move out, and find a new job. i can't sue just because things didn't work out.

[Budious]

You're definitely not in the norm though, most Americans don't share that sense of personal responsibility. It's much easier to seek compensation from the gov't or other party than admit your own bad judgment.

[gigapixels Veteran]

I don't believe this was the right decision. It was ultimately her choice to leave her job and return with him, and therefore he is not the one responsible for her current predicament.

[maplecookie Veteran]

It's not like he had proved he was seriously interested and the relationship was a stable one, they'd been in an on-off again relationship...those are never good.

[gigapixels Veteran]

Exactly. That's why it was down to her judgment and hers alone.

A promise is not a contract and therefore no legal action can come from breaking one. It is one's own decision to trust another's promise, and if he/she doesn't follow through with it, all one can do is simply not trust him/her anymore.

[DrunkenMaster]

The judge is a moron because now people in the same situation are going to sue thinking they can get revenge on the other person.

I agree. Its too bad judges hold so much power that its impossible to have them disciplined or fired. We expect them to have good decision making ability, but this is ridiculous. It was her decision to go back. I could see him maybe moving the costs of her move, but he already down paid all her debts.

Though human emotion involved, if I went to buy a $50,000 car and returned it within a month (say its possible), the dealer can't sue me for $100,000 if its in good order. He'd sue basically for price of car and price he would have earned if the car sold to someone else. She's basically arguing she would have been better financially if she stayed. Certainly not emotionally - shes a nut case.

[Fred Derf Veteran]

Verbal contracts are just as binding as written contracts. They just might be a bit harder to prove. In a case like this, it shouldn't be too hard to get witnesses to testify that they had agreed to marry and he had used terminology like "my fiancee" when referring to the plaintiff.

[nomis_nehc]

I actually have no sympathy for the guy. The girl left her job, basically picked up her life to start something new. Sure it was of her choice, but a choice facilitated by his action.

So good for her. I wish I could make my ex pay for all the promises she screwed me over with.

[Ayepecks]

He sounds like a user. Good for her on standing up for herself.

The money was not for the cost of the wedding. The money is because he convinced her, under a promise of marriage, to quit her job and move to his state. Without this settlement she would have been screwed.

How does he sound like a user?

This woman had massive debt and he paid $30,000 worth of it! He helped make payments on her house... how on earth is that a user? I think every person has the right to back out of a engagement when you learn your significant other has over $42,000 in debt or you simply don't feel like marrying that person because it doesn't work out.

She made the choice to quit her job. Did he convince her with the marriage proposal? Sure, but she made the choice knowing full well it may no work out. This is all just asinine, IMO.