18 Totally New Yo Momma Jokes: January 2012

By americab
in Jokes & Funny Stuff

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americab

Posted
Posted (edited)

1. Your Momma is so fat, she takes her picture with Google Earth.

2. Your Momma is so fat, mountain lions sleep on her titties

3. Your Momma smells. She smells so much they use her to wake people out of comas.

4. Your mother is enormous. As a safety precaution they pay her to live next to the Hoover Dam.

5. Yo Momma is so fat, her pacemaker comes with a solar panel.

6. Your Mother is so fat, her water heater needs a nuclear reactor.

7. Your mothers pant size is xxx. When she walks down the street people try to walk into her ass to watch movies.

8. You ever hear of No Child Left Behind? Your mother is so dumb they had to give up on her.

9. Your mother is so old, they use strands of her hair to carbon date dinosaur fossils.

10. Your mother is titanic. Anytime she goes into water she sinks.

11. Your mother is so fat, she sells her toenails as body armor.

12. Your mother is so fat, I have to use sonar to talk to her.

13. Your mother is so fat even blind people can see her

14. Your mother is filthy. She goes to the sperm bank to clean out her mouth.

15. Scientists watch your mother very closely. They have no choice! Your mother is so fat she can be seen from anywhere on earth.

16. I've never seen a pig like your mother. Or any other type of animal for that matter.

17. Your mother is ugly. She once wore a Target shirt and people started shooting at her.

18. Your mothers face is like a bag of Skittles. Sweet,colorful and causes diabetes.

I decided to make some entirely new jokes. If you find them funny feedback would be awesome. That way I can know if I should try to write some more.

Edited by John S.
link snipped, jokes added--Neowin isn't the place to spam other sites
  • FMH and srbeen
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Grand Master

+Warwagon MVC

Posted
  • MVC
Posted

What does the phrase "pulling a warwagon" mean? What's funny is that you decided to make your response harsh after I told you I wrote them. lol.

you'll find out what pulling a Warwagon means soon enough on this forum! :laugh:

Grand Master

+InsaneNutter MVC

Posted
  • MVC
Posted

Also my fav two! keep up the good work i enjoyed a fair few of them :)

The two funny ones were:

Yo Momma is so fat, she takes her picture with Google Earth.

and

Yo Momma is so filthy she goes to the sperm bank to clean out her mouth.

Grand Master

shakey

Posted
Posted

It's were stupid, stupid.

Well that's not very nice lol

Ooo, but it made me think of a anti yo momma joke...

Yo momma so dumb, she didn't teach you any manners. Not aimed at you, just a typical anti joke that was thought up because of your comment lol.

Rookie

americab

Posted
  • Author
Posted

Well that's not very nice lol

Ooo, but it made me think of a anti yo momma joke...

Yo momma so dumb, she didn't teach you any manners. Not aimed at you, just a typical anti joke that was thought up because of your comment lol.

His mother is like a fire truck. She's usually got five guys on her.

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