18 Totally New Yo Momma Jokes: January 2012


Recommended Posts

1. Your Momma is so fat, she takes her picture with Google Earth.

2. Your Momma is so fat, mountain lions sleep on her titties

3. Your Momma smells. She smells so much they use her to wake people out of comas.

4. Your mother is enormous. As a safety precaution they pay her to live next to the Hoover Dam.

5. Yo Momma is so fat, her pacemaker comes with a solar panel.

6. Your Mother is so fat, her water heater needs a nuclear reactor.

7. Your mothers pant size is xxx. When she walks down the street people try to walk into her ass to watch movies.

8. You ever hear of No Child Left Behind? Your mother is so dumb they had to give up on her.

9. Your mother is so old, they use strands of her hair to carbon date dinosaur fossils.

10. Your mother is titanic. Anytime she goes into water she sinks.

11. Your mother is so fat, she sells her toenails as body armor.

12. Your mother is so fat, I have to use sonar to talk to her.

13. Your mother is so fat even blind people can see her

14. Your mother is filthy. She goes to the sperm bank to clean out her mouth.

15. Scientists watch your mother very closely. They have no choice! Your mother is so fat she can be seen from anywhere on earth.

16. I've never seen a pig like your mother. Or any other type of animal for that matter.

17. Your mother is ugly. She once wore a Target shirt and people started shooting at her.

18. Your mothers face is like a bag of Skittles. Sweet,colorful and causes diabetes.

I decided to make some entirely new jokes. If you find them funny feedback would be awesome. That way I can know if I should try to write some more.

Edited by John S.
link snipped, jokes added--Neowin isn't the place to spam other sites
  • Like 2

What does the phrase "pulling a warwagon" mean? What's funny is that you decided to make your response harsh after I told you I wrote them. lol.

you'll find out what pulling a Warwagon means soon enough on this forum! :laugh:

Also my fav two! keep up the good work i enjoyed a fair few of them :)

The two funny ones were:

Yo Momma is so fat, she takes her picture with Google Earth.

and

Yo Momma is so filthy she goes to the sperm bank to clean out her mouth.

It's were stupid, stupid.

Well that's not very nice lol

Ooo, but it made me think of a anti yo momma joke...

Yo momma so dumb, she didn't teach you any manners. Not aimed at you, just a typical anti joke that was thought up because of your comment lol.

Well that's not very nice lol

Ooo, but it made me think of a anti yo momma joke...

Yo momma so dumb, she didn't teach you any manners. Not aimed at you, just a typical anti joke that was thought up because of your comment lol.

His mother is like a fire truck. She's usually got five guys on her.

This topic is now closed to further replies.
  • Posts

    • Tor Browser 15.0.17 by Razvan Serea Protect your privacy. Defend yourself against network surveillance and traffic analysis. Tor is a network of virtual tunnels that allows people and groups to improve their privacy and security on the Internet. The Tor software protects you by bouncing your communications around a distributed network of relays run by volunteers all around the world: it prevents somebody from watching your Internet connection and learning what sites you visit, it prevents the sites you visit from learning your physical location, and it lets you access sites which are blocked. The Tor Browser Bundle lets you use Tor on Windows, Mac OS X, or Linux without needing to install any software. It can run off a USB flash drive, comes with a pre-configured web browser to protect your anonymity, and is self-contained. Tor Browser 15.0.17 changelog: All Platforms Updated Tor to 0.4.9.11 Updated NoScript to 13.6.25.1984 Build System / All Platforms Bug tor-browser-build#41821: Update gpg subkeys for boklm Bug tor-browser-build#41827: Update morgan's keychain with renewed key Download: Tor Browser (64-bit) | Tor Browser (32-bit) | 109.0 MB (Open Source) View: Tor Browser Website | Other Operating Systems Get alerted to all of our Software updates on Twitter at @NeowinSoftware
    • Very fitting name since AI users have air where there brains should be.
    • Yes, it was amusing at the time because even then dbrand was well known for stealing the designs of products from other companies. That’s what they do.
  • Recent Achievements

    • Reacting Well
      Wakeen1966 earned a badge
      Reacting Well
    • Rookie
      Almohandis went up a rank
      Rookie
    • Apprentice
      jahara21 went up a rank
      Apprentice
    • Reacting Well
      NovaEdgeX earned a badge
      Reacting Well
    • Week One Done
      NovaEdgeX earned a badge
      Week One Done
  • Popular Contributors

    1. 1
      +primortal
      530
    2. 2
      +Edouard
      266
    3. 3
      PsYcHoKiLLa
      148
    4. 4
      Steven P.
      99
    5. 5
      macoman
      56
  • Tell a friend

    Love Neowin? Tell a friend!