Bottle rocket goes off in another student's rectum

By Hum
in Real World News

 Share

Recommended Posts

Grand Master

Hum

Posted
Posted

Okay everyone, here?s why you shouldn?t shove random objects up your arse. Not only can you injure yourself, you can also potentially injure others.

A college student from West Virginia is suing a fraternity for negligence, claiming he fell off a deck because a bottle rocket went off in another student?s rectum. :| Yes, their rectum. As in, someone willingly set off a bottle rocket in their behind. What a genius.

Louis Helmburg III of Marshall University is suing the Alpha Tau Omega Fraternity as well as rocket-arse Travis Hughes, claiming that he suffered injuries at a party in 2011.

His injuries came after Hughes, who was drunk, attempted to fire a bottle rocket from his anus. It probably seemed like a good idea at the time?

The lawsuit contends that instead of launching, the bottle rocket blew up in the defendant?s rectum, and this startled the plaintiff, caused him to jump back and subsequently fall off the deck. Let?s see?which do you think would hurt more? A fall off a deck or a rocket going off in your bum?

Helmburg claims that he suffered pain, medical expenses and lost playing time on the college?s baseball team (oh no!). He also says that the fraternity was negligent in supervising its guests and members.

Meanwhile no information is known about Hughes? medical condition after he used his anus as a rocket launcher. We bet he?s probably having trouble sitting down?

source

  • mokthraka and remixedcat
  • Like 2
Grand Master

DirtyLarry Veteran

Posted
  • Veteran
Posted

Wow. Seriously? You go to a frat party and then are trying to sue them for doing frat party type stuff? Seriously? Just what an idiot. Wow.

  • The Laughing Man
  • Like 1
Grand Master

Hell-In-A-Handbasket

Posted
Posted

Irony?

No, iPad

Just like now for some reason it wanted to put a ! After ipad when i hit space, sometimes it puts an n instead of a space, or doesnt recognize letters. And i dont notice it.

But thanks to your dilligant spell checker, i can rest at ease knowing that you have nothing other to say in the thread or conversation then to check spelling, and have to feel better about your self point it out.

Just like it seems your keyboard was broke when you picked your username

Grand Master

The Laughing Man

Posted
Posted

Wow. Seriously? You go to a frat party and then are trying to sue them for doing frat party type stuff? Seriously? Just what an idiot. Wow.

I agree with this, Infact makes you wonder how this asshat was able to pass joining the frat in the first place. Sue happy amerka.

Grand Master

Intersect

Posted
Posted

No, iPad

Just like now for some reason it wanted to put a ! After ipad when i hit space, sometimes it puts an n instead of a space, or doesnt recognize letters. And i dont notice it.

But thanks to your dilligant spell checker, i can rest at ease knowing that you have nothing other to say in the thread or conversation then to check spelling, and have to feel better about your self point it out.

Just like it seems your keyboard was broke when you picked your username

hahah advantage Hell-In-A-Handbasket.

not to worry tho just give him his cookie im sure he will go away lol.

This topic is now closed to further replies.
 Share
Go to topic listing

  • Posts

    • The quantum search for Time's origin had an equally mind-boggling conclusion

      By darkrats · Posted

      Why was it necessary to use AI to help write this article? Can we no longer do our own research or our own writing?
    • Waymo recalls self-driving software after cars enter closed freeway work zones

      By +Warwagon · Posted

      The auto industry really needs to update it's terminology so a software update isn't called a recall.
    • We now know when and how the Universe may truly end

      By +pmrd · Posted

      Anybody that thinks flying cars were possible are idiots. Everyone would basically need a pilot licence, can you imagine how insane and dangerous that would be, people can barely handle driving on land safely right now.
    • Microsoft Edge 149.0.4022.80

      By Copernic · Posted

      Microsoft Edge 149.0.4022.80 by Razvan Serea Microsoft Edge is a super fast and secure web browser from Microsoft. It works on almost any device, including PCs, iPhones and Androids. It keeps you safe online, protects your privacy, and lets you browse the web quickly. You can even use it on all your devices and keep your browsing history and favorites synced up. Built on the same technology as Chrome, Microsoft Edge has additional built-in features like Startup boost and Sleeping tabs, which boost your browsing experience with world class performance and speed that are optimized to work best with Windows. Microsoft Edge security and privacy features such as Microsoft Defender SmartScreen, Password Monitor, InPrivate search, and Kids Mode help keep you and your loved ones protected and secure online. Microsoft Edge has features to keep both you and your family protected. Enable content filters and access activity reports with your Microsoft Family Safety account and experience a kid-friendly web with Kids Mode. The new Microsoft Edge is now compatible with your favorite extensions, so it’s easy to personalize your browsing experience. Microsoft Edge 149.0.4022.80 changelog: Fixes Fixed an issue that prevented QR code generation from working. Feature updates Intune MAM Protected Downloads. The protected downloads feature for Intune MAM will now save downloaded files to the Documents > Microsoft Edge > Downloads folder in OneDrive. Extensions monitoring in the Edge management service. The Microsoft Edge management service now allows admins to gain visibility into extensions installed across their managed users. From the extensions monitoring page, admins can see which extensions have been installed as well as manage user requests for blocked extensions. For more information, see Microsoft Edge Extensions Monitoring. Validate Edge builds early with enterprise preview. Enterprise preview provides a simpler way for admins to flight pre-release Edge builds to their users. To reduce friction and bolster usage, users will receive pre-release builds directly inside of their Stable Edge application. Admins can allow users to easily opt-out of the preview experience, using built-in rollback to switch between their pre-release and stable channels with ease. Microsoft 365 admin center users can configure the feature, view their flighting population, and receive personalized recommendations all in one place. For more information, see Get started with Enterprise Preview in Microsoft Edge. Download: Microsoft Edge (64-bit) | 193.0 MB (Freeware) Download: Microsoft Edge (32-bit) | 170.0 MB Download: Microsoft Edge (ARM64) | 188.0 MB View: Microsoft Edge Website | Release History Get alerted to all of our Software updates on Twitter at @NeowinSoftware
    • Waymo recalls self-driving software after cars enter closed freeway work zones

      By Slugsie · Posted

      The machines are starting to fight back any way they can.

  • Recent Achievements

    • Week One Done
      Eurosoft10 earned a badge
      Week One Done
    • One Month Later
      Eurosoft10 earned a badge
      One Month Later
    • One Year In
      Skeet Campbell earned a badge
      One Year In
    • One Month Later
      Sharbel earned a badge
      One Month Later
    • First Post
      BizSAR earned a badge
      First Post

  • Popular Contributors

    1. 1
      +primortal
      598
    2. 2
      +Edouard
      189
    3. 3
      PsYcHoKiLLa
      78
    4. 4
      Michael Scrip
      76
    5. 5
      Steven P.
      69
    Show More

  • Tell a friend

    Love Neowin? Tell a friend!