nsfw The official Funny Pictures thread

[Nick H. Supervisor]

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Ref.: https://theonion.com/fda-bans-captain-morgan-rum-after-having-way-too-much-of-that-######-in-college/

Spoiler

WASHINGTON—In a memo that stated they couldn’t even smell the stuff without gagging, officials at the Food and Drug Administration announced Wednesday a plan to ban Captain Morgan rum, citing the fact that they’d had way too much of that ###### in college. “Captain Morgan Rum is not suitable for…ugh, we just need to get rid of that disgusting garbage,” FDA commissioner Robert M. Califf said between pauses to suppress his body’s reflexive urge to vomit, adding that Bacardi Raspberry would also be made illegal for human consumption as he finally retched into a mop bucket. “Our data indicates Captain Morgan rum is nasty as ######. In one study, even the hardest drinkers in our friend group were throwing up by, like, 9:30 p.m. and were passed out in the bathtub a half hour later. In addition, the test subjects were completely hungover for the entire hellish weekend.” Califf, after admitting that maybe he could stomach Captain Morgan rum again now that so much time had passed, reportedly tried taking one sip and instantly puked into his briefcase.

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On 31/12/2024 at 05:22, Nick H. said:

This have seven positive votes at the time I post this. I don't get this one. Can someone please explain this one to me.

[Nick H. Supervisor]

On 30/12/2024 at 22:26, Edouard said:

This have seven positive votes at the time I post this. I don't get this one. Can someone please explain this one to me.

It's a backwards kind of funniness.

She thinks that being followed at night through the desert by a coyote on two feet that speaks to her in her mother's voice is cute. I'm pretty sure if some eldritch creature - because the point is that it is not a coyote she is seeing - did the same to you you wouldn't think it so whimsical...

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On 31/12/2024 at 09:40, Nick H. said:

It's a backwards kind of funniness.

She thinks that being followed at night through the desert by a coyote on two feet that speaks to her in her mother's voice is cute. I'm pretty sure if some eldritch creature - because the point is that it is not a coyote she is seeing - did the same to you you wouldn't think it so whimsical...

Ok, it's clearly above my head. Wtf is an Eldrich Creature and how could I infer that given your post?

I need to smoke a joint to comprehend this one.

Given the support of your original post I'm clearly missing the point and concede that.

I will let it go and move along.

[Nick H. Supervisor]

On 30/12/2024 at 22:50, Edouard said:

Ok, it's clearly above my head. Wtf is an Eldrich Creature and how could I infer that given your post?

I need to smoke a joint to comprehend this one.

Given the support of your original post I'm clearly missing the point and concede that.

I will let it go and move along.

An eldritch creature is a creature that is weird, sinister or ghostly.

How many coyotes do you know that run at the speed of a car, on two legs, and speak in a human language mimicking the voice of someone you know? Wile E Coyote doesn't count even though he checks two of those boxes.

The joke is a bait and switch. It starts out pleasant, like saying, "don't you love it when your girlfriend gives you that smile?"

Your first thought is the picture that follows would be this:

But then instead the picture I show is this:

The joke is that the tweet takes a creepy turn at the end.

[+Edouard Subscriber²]

On 31/12/2024 at 10:16, Nick H. said:

An eldritch creature is a creature that is weird, sinister or ghostly.

How many coyotes do you know that run at the speed of a car, on two legs, and speak in a human language mimicking the voice of someone you know? Wile E Coyote doesn't count even though he checks two of those boxes.

The joke is a bait and switch. It starts out pleasant, like saying, "don't you love it when your girlfriend gives you that smile?"

Your first thought is the picture that follows would be this:

But then instead the picture I show is this:

The joke is that the tweet takes a creepy turn at the end.

Nope...conceding and letting it go. I'm moving on.

 

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