[Joke] Girlfriend 6.0 vs. Wife 1.0


Recommended Posts

I got this joke from a website. The language (especially grammar) is kinda poor but it's pretty funny :D

Last year a friend of mine upgraded from GirlFriend 6.0 to Wife 1.0 and found that it's a memory hog leaving very little system resources available for other applications. He is now noticing that Wife 1.0 is also spawning Child Processes which are further consuming valuable resources. No mention of this particular phenomena was included in the product brochure or the documentation, though other users have informed him that this is to be expected due to the nature of the application.

Not only that, Wife 1.0 installs itself such that it is always launched at system initialization, where it can monitor all other system activity. He's finding that some applications such as PokerNight 10.3, BeerBash 2.5, and PubNight 7.0 are no longer able to run in the system at all, crashing the system when selected (even though they always worked fine before). During installation, Wife 1.0 provides no option as to the installation of undesired Plug-Ins such as MotherInLaw 55.8 and BrotherInLaw Beta release. Also, system performance seems to diminish with each passing day.

Some features he'd like to see in the upcoming wife 2.0.

1. a "Don't remind me again" button

2. a Minimize button

3. An install shield feature that allows Wife 2.0 be installed with the option to uninstall at any time without the loss of cache and other system resources

4. An option to run the network driver in promiscuous mode which would allow the system's hardware probe feature to be much more useful.

I myself decided to avoid the headaches associated with Wife 1.0 by sticking with Girlfriend 7.0. Even here, however, I found many problems. Apparently you cannot install Girlfriend 7.0 on top of Girlfriend 6.0. You must uninstall Girlfriend 6.0 first. Other users say this is a long standing bug that I should have known about. Apparently the versions of Girlfriend have conficts over shared use of the I/O port. You think they would have fixed such a stupid bug by now. To make matters worse, The uninstall program for Girlfriend 6.0 doesn't work very well leaving undesirable traces of the application in the system. Another thing -- all versions of Girlfriend continually popup little annoying messages about the advantages of upgrading to Wife 1.0.

Edited by Jet Blazer
Link to comment
https://www.neowin.net/forum/topic/843164-joke-girlfriend-60-vs-wife-10/
Share on other sites

yes, i agree , they should really fix those bugs

the 'wife' programs genuinely sound more like bad design decisions than honest programming errors, but hopefully the developers will correct the IO conflict problem of the 'girlfriend' series, either in the next release, or better yet issue a patch for the current version

This topic is now closed to further replies.
  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.
  • Posts

    • Steam Next Fest returns with thousands of new demos to try out by Pulasthi Ariyasinghe Valve has been routinely kicking off demo festivals on Steam for years now, and the second drop of 2026 has just opened its doors. It's a great opportunity for any PC gamers to find some interesting games before they release. The June edition of Steam Next Fest is a week-long digital festival including gameplay slices from a large number of indie developers, though a few major publishers are involved this time too. Interested players can use the Next Fest hub page's various sorting and filtering options to easily sort through the hordes of demos available. The top buttons offer quick access to separate and important sorting options, including "By Genre, By Theme, By Feature," with each one offering more granular settings when clicked. At the same time, the built-in Steam tags system is also available below every page to discover new games more quickly. As always, logging in will also enable Steam gamers to utilize Valve's recommendation algorithms to find game demos they might like, specifically, depending on their past play and purchase histories. This time there is even a toggle now to swap between getting a random and personalized selection as Valve collects more data on the available demos. The Charts section is where you can find the most popular demos on the platform right now, offering up the most hyped titles in a simple list. Right at the kickoff, Mistfall Hunter, Empulse, Echoes of Aincrad, Onimusha: Way of the Sword, Over the Hill, Mortal Shell II, and more are trending. Expect this list to change as the week progresses. This edition of the Steam Next Fest is slated to end on June 22 at 10 AM PT. Valve's latest event is now open, and it can be accessed by going to the dedicated hub page here.
    • I lived and breathed MSN Messenger/Windows Live Messenger. Going to the mess.be website (still online with no changes since 2013) to download display pictures etc. I was a beta tester for Messenger Plus! and spent quite a lot of time on the MsgPlus! forums (a read-only copy is still online at https://shoutbox.menthix.net) Some old Neowin articles also https://www.neowin.net/news/messenger-plus-350/ good times but how time flies
    • Well i'll look into a docking station if needed and use that.    Normally i don't usually have all the drives connected at once,  usually once a month to sync the latest files, and then they go back in there storage area   
    • memories! completely forgot about alcohol 120%!!!! man this list just makes me think of all the exciting times! everything's become so sterilized these days. 
  • Recent Achievements

    • One Year In
      ThatGuyOnline earned a badge
      One Year In
    • Week One Done
      Jeroen Wilms earned a badge
      Week One Done
    • Week One Done
      rolfus earned a badge
      Week One Done
    • One Month Later
      Leroy Jethro Gibbs earned a badge
      One Month Later
    • Conversation Starter
      flexorcist earned a badge
      Conversation Starter
  • Popular Contributors

    1. 1
      +primortal
      506
    2. 2
      +Edouard
      200
    3. 3
      PsYcHoKiLLa
      127
    4. 4
      Steven P.
      82
    5. 5
      ATLien_0
      76
  • Tell a friend

    Love Neowin? Tell a friend!