[Joke] Girlfriend 6.0 vs. Wife 1.0


Recommended Posts

I got this joke from a website. The language (especially grammar) is kinda poor but it's pretty funny :D

Last year a friend of mine upgraded from GirlFriend 6.0 to Wife 1.0 and found that it's a memory hog leaving very little system resources available for other applications. He is now noticing that Wife 1.0 is also spawning Child Processes which are further consuming valuable resources. No mention of this particular phenomena was included in the product brochure or the documentation, though other users have informed him that this is to be expected due to the nature of the application.

Not only that, Wife 1.0 installs itself such that it is always launched at system initialization, where it can monitor all other system activity. He's finding that some applications such as PokerNight 10.3, BeerBash 2.5, and PubNight 7.0 are no longer able to run in the system at all, crashing the system when selected (even though they always worked fine before). During installation, Wife 1.0 provides no option as to the installation of undesired Plug-Ins such as MotherInLaw 55.8 and BrotherInLaw Beta release. Also, system performance seems to diminish with each passing day.

Some features he'd like to see in the upcoming wife 2.0.

1. a "Don't remind me again" button

2. a Minimize button

3. An install shield feature that allows Wife 2.0 be installed with the option to uninstall at any time without the loss of cache and other system resources

4. An option to run the network driver in promiscuous mode which would allow the system's hardware probe feature to be much more useful.

I myself decided to avoid the headaches associated with Wife 1.0 by sticking with Girlfriend 7.0. Even here, however, I found many problems. Apparently you cannot install Girlfriend 7.0 on top of Girlfriend 6.0. You must uninstall Girlfriend 6.0 first. Other users say this is a long standing bug that I should have known about. Apparently the versions of Girlfriend have conficts over shared use of the I/O port. You think they would have fixed such a stupid bug by now. To make matters worse, The uninstall program for Girlfriend 6.0 doesn't work very well leaving undesirable traces of the application in the system. Another thing -- all versions of Girlfriend continually popup little annoying messages about the advantages of upgrading to Wife 1.0.

Edited by Jet Blazer
Link to comment
https://www.neowin.net/forum/topic/843164-joke-girlfriend-60-vs-wife-10/
Share on other sites

yes, i agree , they should really fix those bugs

the 'wife' programs genuinely sound more like bad design decisions than honest programming errors, but hopefully the developers will correct the IO conflict problem of the 'girlfriend' series, either in the next release, or better yet issue a patch for the current version

This topic is now closed to further replies.
  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.
  • Posts

    • No. Windows 8 had little to no spywhare, is actually faster than 7 but it has the dreaded start screen, nothing that you could not fix with start8. Windows ME crashed often, but was shotlived and replaced by XP, which is a much better windows in itself.
    • Windows 8 was uninspiring but it was fine / worked. It was just overshadowed by how great Windows 7 was. Windows ME seem to be just unstable for most people - I was using Windows 2000, which was far superior. The two best versions are Windows 7 and 2000
    • I don't think ME was that bad. The stability issues were mostly caused by drivers. This was when the switch from vxd to wdm was happening. The other complaint was not being able to shut down into DOS anymore which was silly with XP right around the corner.
    • As much as I hated Windows 8, although I never used it personally on any of my own machines, I think Windows Me was hands down the worst OS from MS. I have Windows 11 on 2 unsupported machines and haven't had any issues and I actually kind of like it. Still hate how slow Windows updates are though.
    • Why do you think they whol industry would be done? Agree a lot has shifted around the launch with devs moving their dates to avoid the timeframe around the launch. But if this fails, it'll be talked about, analysed, Rockstar will likely be ridiculed but people will move on. Others devs might be more cautious about these large games but I don't think one game will change the entire industry
  • Recent Achievements

    • One Month Later
      Tom Schmidt earned a badge
      One Month Later
    • Week One Done
      Tom Schmidt earned a badge
      Week One Done
    • One Year In
      Tom Schmidt earned a badge
      One Year In
    • One Month Later
      JimErn earned a badge
      One Month Later
    • Week One Done
      Wavespace earned a badge
      Week One Done
  • Popular Contributors

    1. 1
      +primortal
      457
    2. 2
      +Edouard
      176
    3. 3
      PsYcHoKiLLa
      122
    4. 4
      Michael Scrip
      81
    5. 5
      Xenon
      75
  • Tell a friend

    Love Neowin? Tell a friend!