Need to crash my computer. Permanently

By Alpha2004
in Hardware Hangout

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Experienced

Squirrelington

Posted
Posted

take heatsink off and run a cpu intensive application til it frys the proc, then stick the hdd in the microwave or oven

something caused it to overheat :o! ;)

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Grand Master

stezo2k

Posted
Posted
and as for the idiots saying "hes a little kid that doesnt know any better" etc.... im 16 years old

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And? I knew about system requirements when i was 12, i was building up my own PCs when I was 16

If you want to wreck your computer jus disconnect the heatsink fan, that'll overheat the cpu, thus wrecking the main part of your computer

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Proficient

Gaius Baltar

Posted
Posted (edited)

this is hilarious

ok, what i'd do is:

1. go into the bios and **** up all the settings with regards to cpu speed, go really to town on the multiplier ratings, and memory timings.

2. unplug the cpu fan and all the others and leave it to heat up and die, that way it'll just look like a cpu fan failure (go into bios power management settings to make sure cpu throttling etc. is off so it doesn't try to slow down the cpu as it gets hotter)

2.b after doing the above you may have a dead machine but the bios will remember your oc'd settings and thus put you in trouble so best to use the clear cmos jumper on startup (check manual) to wipe all evidence.

3. re-flash your motherboard bios with a new bios file but corrupt it a bit with a hex editor (to be really professional) that way it'll look like a bios file but be bad in areas. WARNING DOING THIS MAY PREVENT YOUR PC FROM FULLY RESTARTING (E.G. FANS SPINNING) THUS PREVENTING MORE MOBO TORTURE

4. take a scalpel to your memory sticks and just break a couple of the copper connectors on the mobo, but this is tricky and easily detectable. best to do this around the screw holes for where screws are used to mount the mobo into the case. that way it will look like when it was built the engineer ****** up the motherboard from the start when they screwed in the mobo into the case, e.g. slashed the mobo with a screwdriver (very bad, very permanent)

after all that, it ain't gonna start up, trust me, if it does, unclip the heatsink and let it run up for about 2 minutes, and then the cpu will die.

PERSONALLY THE ABOVE IS THE EASIEST OPTION AND SHOULD GUARANTEE YOU A NEW MACHINE IF IT'S OLD HARDWARE AS YOUR PARENTS WILL PROBABLY BE PRESENTED WITH THE CASE OF EITHER BUYING OLD BITS TO FIX IT EXPENSIVELY OR JUST FORKING FOR A NEW PC.

if it's an old machine then chances are the cpu will be hard to replace and thus a new machine will arrive.

BUT PERSONALLY THIS IS A BIT MEAN, YOUR PARENT'S PROBABLY HAVE ENOUGH ON THEIR PLATE AS IT IS WITH CHRISTMAS, MORTGAGES, ETC. BUILDING UP, JUST WAIT A BIT, I'M SURE SANTA WILL SURPRISE YOU, CLEAN THE CAR ANYTHING TO PUT YOU IN A GOOD LIGHT, HELP YOUR DAD OUT IN THE GARAGE, CUSTOMISE HIS WHEELS, CHROME HIS HARLEY, WHATEVER IT TAKES.

;)

Edited by indiehead
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Grand Master

shihchiun

Posted
Posted

Find something powered with exposed wires, and touch those wires to your case/something metal on your computer. You might have to experiment a little, my friend completely destroyed his computer that way.

Or maybe you could just be a little more persistent in asking your parents and you wouldn't have to destroy an expensive computer..

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asdfvawerafd

Posted
Posted

get a job you lazy git, i had to save up for and build my own pc when i was 14 and working a paper round and building a website for my dads work. daddy and mummy arent always going to buy everything for you. plus you'll appreciate it much more if you've worked hard to get it

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Raven_Nights

Posted
Posted
get a job you lazy git, i had to save up for and build my own pc when i was 14 and working a paper round and building a website for my dads work. daddy and mummy arent always going to buy everything for you. plus you'll appreciate it much more if you've worked hard to get it

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Huzzah! :D

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Community Regular

The Crock

Posted
Posted

Well, at 16.. if you want it bad enough, get a job.

Honestly what you should do is leave the PC alone, and break nothing. Get about $200, maybe $300 together and get a $40 motherboard and $70 2- to 2.4 Ghz Celeron Processor, get a new power supply and a 256MB of ram, and then just throw a better PC together with the parts in that Dell. Then get a new video card for Christmas, birthday, whatever.

C'mon, if you break the PC... what if they just say "We can't afford it"? Then you will have no Computer at all.

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d3monn

Posted
Posted

I think a good think to do is fry the CPU... magentize it, send an electic circuit to it. I know one time my cousin had his huge stereo speakers too close to his computer when installing the CPU and the magnetic field apparently killed his CPU (as the company's tech support said) seem valid enough, some kind of electric/magnetic shock will work.

Another thing to do is kill the HDD, but those are cheap to replace. If they bring it to a techie he'll say that. You gotta go for the main stuff. Kill the CPU, maybe melt ("overheat") the ram as well.

EDIT: RAM is cheap too..... but if you kill the HDD, its best to take out the RAM. that way they have to spend some money.

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DrZoidberg

Posted
Posted
they will make up some bs as to why they cant get me it

Ive blown over 200$ on games that wont run smoothly on my pc...

and as for the idiots saying "hes a little kid that doesnt know any better" etc.... im 16 years old.  Im tired of this pos laggin on my powerpoint presentations which I create for my school projects....same goes for corel photopaint.

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Perhaps, instead of spending $200 on games that any doofus who can read system requirements on a game box and compare them to his/her own computer would know wouldn't work smoothly, you could have invested this money in buying some new parts for your PC.

Here's a suggestion. Get a job. Save up some $$$. Take this $$$ to your parents. Say "Hey, mom, I've saved $500. A while ago you said you'd buy me a PC. I decided to act my age and be responsible all of a sudden and saved some money up to help out, instead of relying on you entirely. I did think about deliberately trashing my current PC and even posted to a bulletin board on the Internet where a load of strangers told me how to destroy my PC and get you to buy me a new one. I did think of this, but suddenly I was overcome by the guilt I would have felt had I gone through with this. I mean, I could have destroyed my PC and lied to you and dad and misled you and acted like a 12 year old. But no! I decided to act honestly and take the honorable way out. I saved up my own money. And here it is. I don't want to rely on your charity for the rest of my life and I thought I'd show you and dad just how responsible and grown up I could be."

Seriously, grow up. You want to deceive your parents, mislead and lie to them? All because of a PC? Have you no shame or integrity? Your parents may have more urgent priorities than keeping you up-to-date with the latest PC technology. And, instead of destroying your PC, you could donate it to a charity or give it to someone who's never owned a PC and who could take advantage of an older one for simple wordprocessing and Internet tasks.

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Grand Master

Gary_Player

Posted
Posted

Or you could put a few metal shavings onto your mobo and graphics card and see how long it takes before all the short-circuting renders your computer inoperable :)

Happy destroying

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Mentor

dreamthief

Posted
Posted

My Personal Guidelines

RAM

1) Take it out and forcefully slot it wrongly. Turn on the computer and let see the smokes.

2) See the silver markings on the RAM chip? Scratch it off (a small area will do). RAM will not work after that.

CPU

1) Take out the fan, let the computer run for awhile without any fan. Watch for smoke, once spotted, turn off pc. Reattach the fan and pretend nothing happened.

Monitor

1) Turn on and off the monitor repeatedly without stop. Sooner or later the monitor would just, let's say RIP.

HDD

1) Take it out and drop it repeatedly on the floor.

2) Leave the power connector loosely and let it run that way.

Power Supply Unit (PSU)

1) This is a tricky and dangerous procedure. If you have the know how, short circuit it.

that's all. i pretty doubt any of the above doesn't get your computer into a bad damaged shape. :whistle:

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DigitalX_inactive

Posted
Posted
Perhaps, instead of spending $200 on games that any doofus who can read system requirements on a game box and compare them to his/her own computer would know wouldn't work smoothly, you could have invested this money in buying some new parts for your PC.

Here's a suggestion.  Get a job.  Save up some $$$.  Take this $$$ to your parents.  Say "Hey, mom, I've saved $500.  A while ago you said you'd buy me a PC.  I decided to act my age and be responsible all of a sudden and saved some money up to help out, instead of relying on you entirely.  I did think about deliberately trashing my current PC and even posted to a bulletin board on the Internet where a load of strangers told me how to destroy my PC and get you to buy me a new one.  I did think of this, but suddenly I was overcome by the guilt I would have felt had I gone through with this.  I mean, I could have destroyed my PC and lied to you and dad and misled you and acted like a 12 year old.  But no!  I decided to act honestly and take the honorable way out.  I saved up my own money.  And here it is.  I don't want to rely on your charity for the rest of my life and I thought I'd show you and dad just how responsible and grown up I could be."

Seriously, grow up.  You want to deceive your parents, mislead and lie to them?  All because of a PC?  Have you no shame or integrity?  Your parents may have more urgent priorities than keeping you up-to-date with the latest PC technology.  And, instead of destroying your PC, you could donate it to a charity or give it to someone who's never owned a PC and who could take advantage of an older one for simple wordprocessing and Internet tasks.

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VERY WELL PUT. I got a job when I was 13 and haven't asked my parents for money since then. This is a SAD post and what's even worse, I still have friends who are 28-29 years old that still go clothes shopping with their parents because they don't want to buy their own clothes.. :blink:

Uggg!!!!!

~ DigitalX

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Experienced

1Neo1

Posted
Posted
I have the best way....flash ur BIOS chip with a random file from ur hd, that'll fry ur mobo and you'll definitely get another comp

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I agree with you and it only take 1 min to kill mobo.

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Proficient

Iamit2900

Posted
Posted

I would follow the KISS principle (Keep it Simple Stupid). I would just spill some coffee on the computer and the motherboard will fry along with the other stuff. Just say to your parents you were so absorbed with your studying that you completley forgot.

Either that or just serioulsy beg. Cook your parents breakfast or something.

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