My friend is thinking of killing himself!


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dior_addict

He told me and another friend, that he is a failer in life.... and doesn't want to live. He said his friend and him, are in between a girl. They both like her.... Wat should i do to comfort him? and convince him not to. (though i dun think hes THAT serious... but plz help):s

*update* he moved her efrom the philipenses a year ago. Just recently, he started going dillusional, and statrted to find out the purpose he's here on life. And just today, he found out his best frined like the same girl as he... Now he says he doesn't deserve life....

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wired57

don't think he isn't that serious I was there before I was dumped by the girl of my dreams who I wanted to marry she needs to help him you won't have much leong term effect over him as she would.

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persianpsycho

first tell him to keep his mouth shut, because most likely hes just saying that out of rage and anger. I was thinking of doing the same a year back when my life had gotten to the point where it was pointless to get up in the morning (its still bad, just manageable). Anyway, long story short, i told a few friends, they told other people, soon my entire school knew about it, and a week before my birthday 4 cops come and take me out of my fourth period class and question me. I kept denying everything they said, and they had a lot of evidence (web sites, AIM info, poems written in english). Anyway not to drift off subject, i seriously doubt your friend is going to kill himself, you have to either be really really angry and filled with rage to kill yourself, or psychologically corrupt. Just comfort him, make him feel like it'll all end up working out. And i mean, come on, over a girl... there will be plenty of other instances with girls in his life.

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phantomAI

it's not worth killing yourself over a girl anyways, especially since you're still in high school. Come on, a high school girl isn't worth it. I would understand if he lost a job, family, and everything else, but not over some girl.

Provoke your friend, calling him a coward.......taking the easy way out. Tell your friend he should experience suffering so he can learn from it. Eventually he'll get over it. Life's not fair.....get over it.

Yes, I'm not qualified to give any advice. :right:

There's a lot of drama that goes on at your school huh Sniper? Love and death. I know a classmate who was a bit psychotic (sp) and they took him out of school for a few weeks and had to get psychological help.

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Tesseract

This sounds like someone that I know and how they felt after the potental loss of a girl. Girls are not worth killing yourself over to me. Just because a girl breaks up with you or does not want to go out with you does not mean life is over.

I would tell him that there are other girls that feel the same way and want a chance. Also tell him that there is more to life than girls and stuff. I enjoy life very much without worry about relationships and stuff (for now anyway). ;)

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Mr. Black

On the religous front, tell him he will goto hell if he does.

On a more down to earth level, tell him he has many years ahead of him that he will have to find somebody. It's not all over because of one girl. I'm sitting here at 19 without a g/f and never had one through h/s, and still a virgin :p

If anyone should commit suicide I should... :)

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PureEdit
Originally posted by persianpsycho

first tell him to keep his mouth shut, because most likely hes just saying that out of rage and anger. I was thinking of doing the same a year back when my life had gotten to the point where it was pointless to get up in the morning (its still bad, just manageable). Anyway, long story short, i told a few friends, they told other people, soon my entire school knew about it, and a week before my birthday 4 cops come and take me out of my fourth period class and question me. I kept denying everything they said, and they had a lot of evidence (web sites, AIM info, poems written in english). Anyway not to drift off subject, i seriously doubt your friend is going to kill himself, you have to either be really really angry and filled with rage to kill yourself, or psychologically corrupt. Just comfort him, make him feel like it'll all end up working out. And i mean, come on, over a girl... there will be plenty of other instances with girls in his life.

That sucks :(

Dont let him do it, find out how serious he is, people DO joke about that somtimes to get attention, but he may be serious. People have Killed themselfs over girls and lots of other things before, it is not right, but it happens :(

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persianpsycho

well tell your friend it could always be worse... a women could cut off his penis and throw it out of the window of a moving car :p

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dior_addict

i'll do wat u guys say, but here are a few more things he said:

"im a failure........in life.....cant even defend my own father....bad grades....no friends........conspiracy......."

"y was i born i dnt even knw who i am........"

"i cnt even help my father...............i was not a good son"

".................i feel sad for my father........he is all alone in d philippines and nobody is there to take care of him............after my mom filed divorce on my dad bcoz of some stupid guy my mom met........"

"i will die with a nice knife i guess":S

so you see, it zmore than just a girl. :hurt:

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Koto

Bah, if he was going to kill himself, he would have already. He wouldn't have told you and bitched about it and stuff. He just wants attention, or something. :right:

I've been though this "friend says he/she is/might going to kill him/herself" situation a million times.

Basically, if they were going to, they would have already.

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persianpsycho
Originally posted by PureEdit

That sucks :(

Dont let him do it, find out how serious he is, people DO joke about that somtimes to get attention, but he may be serious. People have Killed themselfs over girls and lots of other things before, it is not right, but it happens :(

2 people close to me have commited suicide, nearly a year apart from each other:(

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kryptonik

What..? Killing himself over a girl?

Tell him that commiting suicide is the most childish way out of something and he is not gonna prove anything except make people that love him, feel terrible. That is probably not the most smartest thing to do, and as other people are saying he still has so many years ahead of him.

IT IS NOT WORTH IT!!!

Good day!

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Koto

He says he has no friends, yet you consider him a friend?

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Koto
Originally posted by Sniper34123

i'll do wat u guys say, but here are a few more things he said:

"im a failure........in life.....cant even defend my own father....bad grades....no friends........conspiracy......."

"y was i born i dnt even knw who i am........"

"i cnt even help my father...............i was not a good son"

".................i feel sad for my father........he is all alone in d philippines and nobody is there to take care of him............after my mom filed divorce on my dad bcoz of some stupid guy my mom met........"

"i will die with a nice knife i guess":S

so you see, it zmore than just a girl. :hurt:

That's just self-pity.

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Tesseract

When I was in 6th and 7th Grade, it seemed that no one liked me and that everyone wanted to pick on me. I thought about commiting suicide. It was a very bad feeling. I focused too much on the negative, and also I did not let anyone help me. I got over it as the months went by, and now I am fine.

Give him some motivation, and let him know that he is NOT a failure and that you will be there for him. Any type of motivation will help. :)

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phantomAI
Originally posted by Mr. Black

On the religous front, tell him he will goto hell if he does.

On a more down to earth level, tell him he has many years ahead of him that he will have to find somebody. It's not all over because of one girl. I'm sitting here at 19 without a g/f and never had one through h/s, and still a virgin :p

If anyone should commit suicide I should... :)

same here, except I'm 18. I'm at college and have no friends that I hang out with. It's so lonely here for me. I hardly ever thought about killing myself (couldn't do it), but I have thought about never being borned. Sigh....hopefully my life will get better.

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PureEdit

I was like that to, but then I found computers, and now I am better at somthing then everybody else (That I know) :)

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dior_addict

well, after half an hour of talking, i think he decided not to. He seemed to calm down, and then started talking about sumthing diff. Well, thanks fer ur help guys! ;)

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sunnyy4

If you're in the same school as he is, go tell the counselor. If not, then tell him that he's not a failure and that you have faith in him.

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BananaMan

I haven't read the rest of everyone's posts so forgive for me if I repeat someone's advice..

You are his friend, depending on how close you are to him and how intuitive you are about people's sincerity and emotions, you can tell if he really means it. If he doesn't mean it, still be sensitive, let him know that suicide is not the solution, perhaps be blunt with him too and mention how selfish suicide is, how it would throw his family into termoil that never ends, and how life is a gift - and also a right, he deserves life just as much as the next guy or gal. Also, there are plenty of other girls out there, and since the relationship failed with that girl, that simply means that it wasn't meant to be and that it was going to end eventully even if the course of events were altered somehow. Everyone has someone out there who their destined to be with (IMO), whether it be a soulmate-ship based on friendship or romance.

I'm typing ultra-fast so forgive my incoherence, I have to run.. good luck. And hey, if you think he's being serious, take some action, report it. Talk to a over-the-phone counciller about what to do with him.

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PureEdit

Just tell him to relax, turn on some nice music, and think of things you enjoy :)

That works for me :)

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lrnecnaecge

Reminds me of about 2 months ago where I was at the point where I had a bottle of 800mg pills in my hand and was crying about to take them when my friend stopped me and told me that nothing is worth dying for, nothing. Since then I have taken to heart those words and have been trudging alone despite my father all but disowning me and having quite a few other problems plaguing my thoughts.... the best thing I think you can do for your friend is just try to comfort him and help him with his feelings and most of all, be there for him when he needs someone to talk or cry too.

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Louisville Slugger
Originally posted by Tesseract

This sounds like someone that I know and how they felt after the potental loss of a girl. Girls are not worth killing yourself over to me. Just because a girl breaks up with you or does not want to go out with you does not mean life is over.

I would tell him that there are other girls that feel the same way and want a chance. Also tell him that there is more to life than girls and stuff. I enjoy life very much without worry about relationships and stuff (for now anyway). ;)

Well said, yes I agree. Girls are just not worth the death, because if you kill yourself, you'll never know if there was another perfect girl for you. You never know you could find another one, or she could come around. ;)

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  • 4 weeks later...
mr.dan

it's nearly impossible to reason with a person who is contemplating suicide, because it seems like the way out no matter what.

all they do is listen to themselves argue

i've stayed on the phone with a girl for 3 hours once, which is pretty much my only encounter with this situation.

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